There definitely needs to be changes made to the law in the UK which allows sections to go on for many years for patients who are of no risk to the public yet they are kept a prisoner on never ending prison sentences at great cost to the public which could be better spent on improving the NHS. Tribunals can be long and drawn out it is determined by the opinion of an “expert” – psychiatrist/team whether that person is either a risk to the public or a risk to themselves. The latter is no excuse to keep someone inside for years and years on end which makes rehabilitation that much harder. I have found that hospitalisation leads to more insecurity, loss of confidence and dependence upon the team. It is all about control and money and totally unfair – given the right support I believe that there is hope for many who are currently just thrown on the scrap heap.

At one point, prior to frequent hospital admissions, Elizabeth was on a local acute ward for close to two years where the care was mainly drugs. However she was allowed to come home at weekends and the family got to see her regularly. However, all the time Elizabeth was desperate to get out of hospital and return to life in the community – she spoke of her wish to get a job and I was full of hope but the process of getting her released from hospital dragged on and on due to lack of facilities and it was felt and certainly hoped by me that having a flat in a scheme could be the answer for her future independence but first of all the next step was placing her in a rehab unit (on hospital grounds) she was about the only girl amongst 9 men on this ward and this was not good and turned out disastrously. I had such high hopes for this rehab unit but patients were pretty much allowed to do whatever they liked with little supervision and Elizabeth is vulnerable which was not a good situation. Whilst on this ward Elizabeth started smoking. Lots of patients were just lying around doing nothing and I thought – there is no way I want this for Elizabeth so I tried to get her away from this “care”. I had desperately tried to get Elizabeth away from the system before in terms of helping her get a little job. I realised she could not do very much because her memory seemed impaired by the drugs but Elizabeth is not a lazy person – some people think that of mental health patients and they are very wrong. Elizabeth was not capable of getting to and from appointments or remembering them due to the level of drugs she was on. She was just left to go downhill in my opinion and little encouragement from the team. I took her to Reed Employment Pathways to find a job as they help in such a way to provide mentors etc and when someone has been in hospital for so long they lose confidence quickly – The hospital did nothing to provide someone to accompany her and I had to do all the driving to and fro in the hope that Elizabeth could get away from this shocking care. When I visited the ward one evening I noticed a beautiful flower arrangement on a table and I got to hear that Elizabeth did this. I then spoke to the staff that I felt this could be something that Elizabeth could benefit from as she was artistic and I then went down to a local specialist college where they do agriculture studies amongst other things and I enrolled her on this short course. I did speak to staff to book this course for Elizabeth but when nothing was done I decided to do it and the consultant psychiatrist was not at all pleased. It meant me having to go to the hospital and pick her up once a week and take her and I waited outside the whole time as sometimes Elizabeth would suffer a panic attack and on occasions refused to go in but what a transformation when she did go in and these were able bodied people not disabled. Elizabeth was able to make a flower arrangement as good as any of them and the staff liked them and wanted to buy the flower arrangements. The consultant psychiatrist who was far from happy at first even had to admit that it was a good thing for Elizabeth who would come out of the classroom a different person. I am sad to say that Elizabeth did not get the qualification for the flower arranging course. She was meant to go to the college at a certain time during the day and I could not take her and she may not have seemed keen to do the bit of written work outstanding but this is where the team should have been more persuasive and encouraging and the teacher was most upset about it and so was I. All those months and beautiful arrangements but nothing to show for it.

In addition to the flower arranging course I also used to take Elizabeth running and I tried to keep her fit as I noticed to my horror that most of the other mentally ill patients seemed to either be smoking or eating junk food and not exercising. I used this opportunity to go running to practise for my forthcoming police bleep test which proved very beneficial.

Elizabeth suffered mood swings as a result of the high level of drugs she was on – she was clearly having a very bad reaction to this drug and I had read it should only be given short term, not long term and she had been on it for years. At home I felt it could be upsetting for Elizabeth as her sister was now happy and on top of the world despite being diagnosed with Schizophrenia – how can this be that I see my younger daughter so very happy and it makes me think mistakes were made and a diagnosis in both cases was given far too hasily without proper intensive trauma therapy and counselling instead of the mind altering drugs.

Going back to when she was 19 and problems first began Elizabeth lived at home, had suffered trauma and I don’t know who or why she went to see her doctor but this doctor prescribed Cipralix and she took herself off this drug 30mg in one go – this was not my idea or suggestion but she chose to do it as she was suffering serious side effects before going abroad for a trip of a lifetime. I immediately noticed a change in Elizabeth whislt on this drug and her deteriorated behaviour was definitely linked to taking this drug which led to aggression/severe side effects like severe headaches and behaviour and skin problems. I had never seen such behaviour in her before and her appearance went downhill too. She no longer seemed to care about anything but the drug was not working – she was getting worse on this drug. I did not advise her to go to her doctor but I believe someone did the drug Cipralix led her to scratch her face causing scar toher once perfect skin and leading to a pattern of behaviour where she was suddenly rebellious and seemed to lose interest in things. Her eating habits had changed from vegetarian to vegan and she was hardly at home, during this time I was caring for my elderly father who had Alzheimers as well as my younger daughter sectioned who is now on top of the world. Sadly Elizabeth came under mental health services and to begin with I just wanted her to get help – I had no idea of how shocking things were re care and drugging. She was put on a waiting list for 9 months and then came the labels one after the other. I know that these labels lead to drugs and access to services but always felt that her behaviour was as a direct result of the drugs not down to any label these experts chose to give as I had witnessed Elizabeth’s eyes and she described to me her suffering on these drugs with many serious side effects mentioned on the leaflet that I felt she was doing the right thing by coming off the drugs which was her decision but I wish I had insisted she did this very very slowly as that I reckon led to her psychosis by coming off them in one go. She was then told by a psychiatrist local care that she had Schizophrenia and would have to take drugs for the rest of her life – it was then I noticed how she seemed to give up on life and felt she could do nothing any more. I was upset about this -I had already seen the effects of these chemicals on my younger who was also diagnosed with Schizophrenia as a child and against my wishes given these drugs whilst sectioned (Rispiridal) (wrongly reported in Daily Mail on Line) which made her balloon in weight and suffer more anxiety than before. Both of my daughters suffered trauma which I cannot go into on this blog but was not family related and involved police. Elizabeth has suffered far more by being under the services of mental health care. Every hospital admission saw an increase in drugs and Elizabeth just did not seem to get on with these drugs at all and they seemed to make her worse but I desperately tried (not only with the floristry course, a voluntary job, a netball team, running club and competitions which meant taking her twice a week, many other things) to get her away from mental health services and get her integrated into society. Even at the scheme where she was placed I made a point of having her to stay at home during weekends up to a point but then the drug (Quetiapine) which she had been on a long time seemed to be having a terrible adverse effect on her – namely Akathisia. Elizabeth missed out on some very good times as a result of the adverse effects of these drugs which meant I could not have her to stay even like I used to and she was not happy at the scheme but nothing was done about this at all despite my complaints. Elizabeth missed out on the wedding of one of my best friends which was in the Lake District in a beautiful peaceful area which would have suited her. Elizabeth missed out on the spa hotel and would have enjoyed this but she was too unwell to take. Instead Elizabeth was becoming more and more isolated in the scheme. She would tell staff to go away but I did notice at one point she was responding to another resident more than staff and going out with that resident who happened to be a very nice person however this person had her own problems and was not always well enough. The more isolated Elizabeth became the more she was giving up on life and not caring about anything any more. She was not eating well, she was living off junk food and was not looking after her flat any more. Staff stay away if someone refuses help/appears to be going downhill and one week only £10 had been taken out of the money I left with the staff all week but the staff took the view that I should not help with the washing/ironing and just let it pile up to the point she would have to do something but I could not see this was ever going to happen. The more mess and chaos the more this would affect Elizabeth so I disagreed with this view to let someone get on with it. Clearly the scheme was not right for her and the loud thumping music got on her nerves which was caused by a neighbour below – you could feel the vibration of this music and Elizabeth once was sitting alone with no light as a light bulb had gone – not right at all – such a scheme is good for those you can manage but due to the length of time in hospital this scheme just did not work out unfortunately but the idea in itself is a good one. I am not criticising the scheme as a whole as it is good for some people just like the drugs – some people can get on with them.

It is sad that Elizabeth is so far away and for so long was left to go downhill as no one did anything about the drugs despite her email to social services begging to be reduce off the drugs and when I insisted on having a copy of this email which I felt Elizabeth was entitled to have, this led to me being banned for a while at the scheme and Elizabeth having to come down in her dressing gown and sit in the car with me. Also her social worker stepped in desperately trying to push Clozapine at my daughter and each time she refused and Elizabeth complained to me about this and I complained to the social worker – social workers are not doctors and should not push drugs. The Bethlem was supposed to give her a drug free period of assessment like Professor Murray suggested – in the first week she was offered Clozapine twice and each time she refused. Elizabeth had also given consent to the whole family to see the medical file and signed an Advanced Declaration. The Bethlem abused her human rights by eventually succeeding in drugging her up to such an extent, mixing the Seroquel with Olanzapine and taking her off a steep amount to the point my daughter rang me time and time again whilst I was at work in a distressed state. When I complained to the Bethlem the response was to send threatening letters about my behaviour being upsetting to staff and other patients. In fact the other patients were pleased to see me on the ward and were interested in the oils that I brought which Dr Ann Blake Tracy recommended. “the only thing that helps me is the oils, Mum” I also brought a box of supplements in prescribed by the private psychiatrist I appointed and these have gone missing. I have not had a response from the Bethlem about the supplements and sent them the bill of £130 and as for Cambian if they say they have got them I will need to see proof – they had run out of fish oils a while back and this makes me question whether it is true or not that they have found the supplements and I need to see proof as already a mobile phone has gone missing and a blanket but the blanket they say they will pay for – well £130 may not be a huge amount but it is the principal – these supplements must be found for when Dr Walsh comes over as they may be useful then when he comes up with the correct treatment for my daughter.

So I got to find out by chance the Bethlem had put her on Clozapine – Elizabeth said she was on a new drug beginning with the letter M and I then told the staff at the Bethlem that they should tell my daughter what she was on and it was when I took her running in the grounds I soon got to find out and then I was consequently banned and no longer could I spend lovely days in Bromley and Croydon with my daughter. I was cut down to 1 hr and eventually banned altogether. I have never experienced such abuse in my life and other people I had taken along with me as witnesses were equally shocked. Also I did not get all the papers concerning myself under the Data Protection Act like I am entitled. I should have got copies of minutes I attended – Elizabeth was not present but where was my copy of the minutes. Instead I had to ensure that I did the minutes of the meeting and luckily I do shorthand and when I was cut short in conversation by the consultant psychiatrist who was not interested in all the books/information I brought along to show him. Many of the people at these meetings which contained as many as 9 were students and I hope they learnt something with all the information I brought but no wonder such a meeting was distressing to Elizabeth with 9 people and no advocate present. It is no wonder everything was done wrong. They did not have a clue how to decrease my daughter off the drug properly and this led to her suffering psychosis – nothing to do with the so called label which was incidentally disputed by another professional so I saw in the local files. Well you cannot take someone off 150mg of Seroquel and mix it with Olanzapine – the consultant psychiatrist was too lazy to read any of the books I brought. He said “I have enough reading to do”. I showed him exactly how things should be done and the instructions were by professionals not by me just a mother however even I knew you cannot do such a steep reduction as 50mg was too steep a reduction last time – Dr Ann Blake Tracy gives the correct instructions and in her book Prozac Panacea Pandora there are many interesting facts listed. I have spoken to her on the telephone and am in touch and wish to thank her personally for all the advice she has given me.

My only good experience of the time my daughter was at the Bethlem was the all day trips out to Croydon and Bromley as well as the fete in the grounds but then all this was spoiled by the consultant psychiatrist and team when I was banned from seeing my daughter but she was texting me just like she was at Cambian during the time the team said I could only have supervised phone calls at 6.00 pm on Mondays at her request. None of this is true and I have proof of it

There is such dishonesty and manipulation/bullying going on and the law fails to protect people like my daughter. Vulnerable people need more protection and a team will stick together if things go wrong. Also there is the element of exclusion and lack of communication.

The arrangements for the Tribunal have been going on since end of last year and have been dragged out for one reason or another which I have previously documented – the team like to play on capacity and what when someone has just taken the drugs and is in no fit state to give a decision. There are times when someone lacks capacity and this leads to manipulation by the team. – for example the consent from my daughter for Dr Walsh to be involved as well as her consent to see the independent doctor – many disturbing things have happened and I am against the section as when mistakes have been made by the Bethlem what on earth is my daughter being punished for. Adverse behaviour can come about withdrawing from any drug – this was entirely their fault and not my daughter’s and I think it is disgusting that this should be allowed to go on. I cannot say too much – a Tribunal is a chance for someone to come off a section and my daughter is currently not a risk to anyone – she needs more support and care than ever now and I as a mother and the Nearest Relative (the team want rid of) want the best for my daughter and am determined to get this one way or the other especially after the shocking way she has been treated – not only for my daughter but there needs to be a complete review and update in the law and care.

I did not think the best care is on offer locally and funding should be supplied to an area where there is good care if someone wishes for this and everyone is different and should have the choice and right to choose. This outdated law needs to be changed as public money is being wasted with the dragging out of Tribunals and never ending sections. The money would be better spent on A&Es in my opinion – also if these drugs are given on such a long term basis there needs to be proper health checks and if someone is suffering terrible side effects then the correct facility should be given for that person to come off the drugs rather than deteriorate and if things were done like Dr Tracy says correctly then that patient should not end up suffering terrible withdrawal symptoms – even on 1mg you should have seen the effects on my younger daughter. – The right environment is peaceful and not a shocking acute ward as I saw so many patients returning to these wards and obviously not getting better. I recognised the same faces with every admission of my daughter. A patient was feeling disturbed may well need peace and quiet and there is no peace and quiet on the wards that is for sure. Also someone like Dr Walsh and a team of other doctors he wants to train up could help my daughter more as she has complained of not being listened to and then I end up speaking up for her to the staff who just ignore and take no notice. Then you get labelled yourself as “aggressive”. The private orthomolecular psychiatrist listened to my daughter when she said she was experiencing terrible side effects (Akathisia). I have never seen her look so happy and when I took her up to the Bio Lab in London – if things were done properly then she would not have suffered like she has and I am far from happy she is on a section because of their mistakes. Not once do you ever get any apologies. I also do not agree with CTOs.

There are more and more cases of drug induced psychosis and yet no one is questioning the safety of such drugs except for a few who are brave enough to speak the truth – Dr Candace Pert (Molecules of Emotion) Prof David Healy – Pharmageddon and I have other books too from professionals. It is these professionals who should be called upon to help along with others like Dr Ann Blake Tracy, Dr William Walsh, Peter Breggin, Joanna Moncrief and others – with their help a better kind of care and choice could be given to MH patients unlike at present and especially for those who have been written off and classed as “untreatable”. This is nonsense in my opinion – no one should give up on anyone and label them untreatable and more research needs to be done on the safety of these drugs in a proper manner – the drugs manufacturers should be doing something to help the victims of the pharmaceutical industry. I can prove I am not alone in wishing for change as I am in touch with many others who feel the same way and I believe patients should be included and that the Government should take a look at the success rate in Tornio Finland where I would like to take my daughter and would consider living there.

The law and what is going on in the UK is against God as I believe that much profit is being gained at the expense of the weak and vulnerable like my daughter. I am shocked that the religions of the world do not do something about this situation as I cannot think of anything more diverse than mental health which can affect anyone with devasting effects.

Friday – out with friends and colleagues on two occasions. Saturday a quiet day but could not get through to Elizabeth on her new phone. I could not hear what Elizabeth was saying the night before as I was in a noisy station and I had to buy her a new phone as it has mysteriously gone missing. Elizabeth now has that phone and telephoned me yesterday.

Tomorrow my younger daughter is preparing a BBQ for my Birthday but I shall miss being a complete family without Elizabeth there as well but cruelly in accordance with the dated and shockingly cruel law of the UK Elizabeth is held miles away in Wales on a sentence that can go on forever under the Mental Health Act despite the fact she has done nothing wrong. All she did was push two nurses out of the way as she wanted to go outside of the prison camp environment of the horrific Bethlem Royal Hospital. Prior to that Elizabeth suffered from Akathisia which can only be described as the most horrific side effect from the drugs themselves NOTHING TO DO WITH ANY KIND OF LABEL OR DIAGNOSIS OF WHICH THERE ARE THOUSANDS TO MATCH EVERYONE IN DSM 5. No, Elizabeth was suffering from the results of the drug itself namely Quetiapine manufactured by Astra Zeneca who I wrote to personally to tell them of the shocking side effects my daughter was suffering and everything is shrouded in secrecy. Well I believe in openness and honesty and am documenting everything like this for the world to see as no one has a clue what really goes on behind closed doors of the shocking care in the UK. I do not discount good members of staff are present. I can even list some of them but that is not the point I am right in saying that the law, the care is dated and needs changing and even some professionals agree with me but God forbid if they speak out. I am just a mother but have encountered shocking abuse and bullying so you can imagine the bravery of those who do speak out and the consequences they are faced with when there are some at the top who only care for themselves and not those who are the most vulnerable people that need support and care. It is not just the professionals take a look at social services who get involved in the pushing of drugs too. They are no professionals in terms of knowledge of drugs so what on earth are they doing! I have received bullying and can prove it in writing and total lack of inclusion and communication in the past and they cannot do anything right now as I have solicitors appointed but what when those solicitors are not appointed – who is going to protect me as a mother then as once the solicitors disappear it will give the grounding for the so called healthcare professionals and social services who provide the funding to attempt again the displacement of me as the Nearest Relative. This will be done in the most manipulative way as I have seen attempted that my daughter has been asked whether she really wants me to be the nearest relative. This has been done by one particular person and I cannot mention who it is but the person approached Elizabeth on her own without an advocate or anyone present. Elizabeth feels threatened and afraid of the staff that she will lose reputation by not agreeing with them. How wicked the care is. When the nurses discovered my daughter Elizabeth was out in the car waiting for the expert witness doctor who would be representing her in court to arrive they pushed past me like I was a piece of rubbish to grab Elizabeth from the car stating she needed to eat something when in fact the drugs were due. Drugs that could have sent her to sleep and rendered her incapable of meeting the private expert witness doctor that had appointed for the Tribunal. I insisted on waiting in the corridor for the doctor to finish interviewing my daughter alone and he had to hang on for the consultant psychiatrist and even ask where she was! The consultant psychiatrist who does not like me was late and this doctor needed to catch a train home on time so I had offered a lift and besides it was raining. There was no way I was going anywhere because Elizabeth wanted to get a box of chocolates for another patient. The staff refused and they played on the law for her leave which I pointed out had originally been agreed for 2 nights but in fact I only needed 1 night and this was because I had heard from other people how these tribunals are sabotaged by professionals who are a law unto themselves – they can drug and drug someone up to such an extend they can brainwash that person against their own family. That is what is going on as I see it by this private hospital team. The Tribunal should have taken place sooner rather than later and is now not scheduled until October. It is laughable that psychiatrists are answerable to no one and can sit their smugly smiling – I have seen this several times. However there are a few out there who are honest and have a conscience and I have found good representation for my daughter in court and may God praise those who are honest and brave enough to stand up against the shocking abuse of human rights allowed to go on in the UK – a so called civilised country which in my opinion is far from civilised. It is the “uncivilised” undeveloped countries that have more respect for the mentally ill. I would like to see a change in this shocking care in the UK not just in hospitals but in the community as it is the community care that is failing many sending them back into hospital time and time again simply because people can become isolated by society and have become dependant and disabled not only because of the drugs but because of the care itself that leads someone to have to rely on having things done for them and end up dependant on others and suffering from worse anxiety and even agoraphobia like never before. The longer someone is in hospital the more dependant they become and the harder it is to rehabilitate them. Whilst every case is different people get treated the same and they are not treated with respect and the care is mainly drugs which do not help someone who has suffered terrible abuse. The drugs companies should be more answerable and help financially in order to give more choice in care hat does not revolve around solely drugs. Why should they care when they get so much in profit and the psychiatrists are on good money. It is all wrong in my opinion. Elizabeth will be brought down here soon but no doubt for a flying visit. She has only been allowed to spend 1 night yet most of the time is travelling which must be stressful. Why not 2 nights. Why are these professionals allowed to have the power to play God. I may not be the most religious person but I believe in God and hope he will do something to help my daughter and stop this abuse going on. Where are all the religions of the world? Why aren’t they uniting in this fight to end abuse of this nature? Well I believe that I have been put in this position of having to speak out, of having to fight for some kind of justice. I believe God has put me in this position and am honoured and pleased to take on such a challenge not just for my daughter but for everyone. The consultant psychiatrist at the Bethlem told me to sit back and leave it all to the professionals that my daughter was in good hands. Well the minute I heard what they were going to do I brought proof with me on how things should be done and this did not go down well and the next thing I was banned. He also said “I have enough reading to do”. This is nonsense. This is laziness on his partas I have little time but still have researched and looked into things properly and sought advice from professionals in the States. Proper advice which I brought with me to the meetings to prove and was treated like a criminal. I was even threatened with arrest on more than one occasion. I am not bothered by this or any threats but it is a different matter if you are on a shocking prison sentence worse than any jail under MH care. Why should someone but go along with the team. Why cant the team learn and respect and treat patients like a human being. It is one thing treating me like this but another thing in treating a patient this way and this to my opinion is totally unacceptable.

I thought it strange I had not heard from my daughter Elizabeth in response to my text message. I do not telephone every day but was concerned about her wellbeing particularly in light of certain things that have gone on which I hope will be investigated as I now have the legal papers ready for court.

Anyway, her sister also had trouble getting through. She telephoned the office and spoke to her through the office. You have to wait in order for the staff to locate Elizabeth’s whereabouts and you could be hanging on for a long time. It is not so bad if you are on the house phone but during the week I am on the mobile and out of concern for my daughter I telephoned. Could not get through, telephone constantly ringing but no answer. I then telephoned the office and a member of staff said she would look for my daughter and get her to answer the pay phone. Anyway I was just kept hanging on and on and on – I then had to telephone back and the member of staff apologised she had forgotten about me. Elizabeth came on the phone and the conversation was brief. Prior to this staff would not call her because she was in a psychology class and when I could not get through later I then telephoned her the next day.

The explanation I have had from Cambian is that her phone as gone missing. I then asked if the staff could help my daughter find the telephone and I got a call back today to say they could not find it.

I am so extremely concerned for my daughter’s wellbeing. Without a telephone to ring anyone in the family she is very highly vulnerable. I am most unhappy and so are other family members and some are suspicious of the phone going missing as some time ago the phone constantly charging in the office and when I complained I got a short curt letter from the Manager of Cambian to say that it was at my daughter’s request that I only be allowed to have supervised phone calls every Monday at 6.00 pm and the staff said that was her decision. When I spoke to my daughter and witnessed by other family members I was told that this was not true. Now I am having to buy another phone and send it to her special delivery.

Cambian said they would reimburse the rug but if her phone keeps on going missing then this is not a good situation.

In addition to this I have been waiting to hear from the Welsh Tribunals Office and so have my solicitors. When my solicitors said they received no response I rang myself and know the person who is dealing with matters. I telephoned this morning but unfortunately my telephone cut out but not before we had discussed a date for the Tribunal as everyone would like to be there but my solicitors have said that the Tribunal can be arranged by their office at any time they wish without consideration to the family. The person I spoke to sounded very nice and helpful and I explained how upsetting it was that it has all taken so very long and how I have felt that things have been dragged out by one thing and another and definitely the team were involved in delaying the tribunal. It is as though they just want to keep hold of my daughter forever on a prison sentence because that is what it is. She pushed a couple of nurses out of the way at the Bethlem as she wanted to go out in the grounds. You only have to show the slightest bit of reaction and the staff are watching, assessing all the time. I have been kept under strict scrutiny by this team like a criminal and no one has been honest to tell me the reason why I have been treated this way. Well I have found out now – it is all in the legal papers which I have. The truth always reveals itself in the end but the lack of communication and inclusion – deliberate exclusion from the very beginning whilst the team ganged up trying to replace me has left me feeling that this is far from the care I thought my daughter would get. Care should be compassionate. Care should not be pushing and forcing someone to do chores so I have heard. How do the staff possibly know what it feels like to be on 800mg of mind altering drugs. Elizabeth has told me she feels tired, and the drug is highly sedatory. To top it all other drugs like Lorazepam and paracetamol are given on top. This is why I asked where the oils were from DR Tracy and Elizabeth has confirmed they have been found. So, my next question is where are the supplements from the private psychiatrist I appointed? A while back Cambian were short of fish oils and I had no end of fish oils in that box so where are these supplements which cost £130. Well I want to see proof of where they are otherwise I shall be giving a bill to both the Bethlem and Cambian for reimbursement. Now the telephone is missing but Elizabeth will not be without a telephone for long as I am dealing with this immediately. The more telephones that go missing the more suspicious it looks.

They are having a meeting on the 8th August but I will not be going down on this occasion after all. There will surely be another meeting before the Tribunal.

Elizabeth’s Tribunal of course was unsuccessful and I was excluded from this – her father went instead and of course it was only when I appointed solicitors myself that I found out the entire team were plotting once again to have me removed as the Nearest Relative.

Today in my lunch hour I met with one of the many mothers I am in touch with campaigning for her child. So many have got in touch with me all with the same problem, lack of inclusion and communication, bullying and threats. When is Mr Hunt and Mr Lamb going to do something about this situation and I spoke to Mr Behan of the CQC about how I was treated and the shocking way my daughter has been treated by a system that needs complete and absolute overhaul. Both Mr Behan and Mr Lamb spoke of changes as I was not the only mother getting up to speak at this conference in the same way.

I wrote to social services today about the therapeutic communities and how this could benefit my daughter before she comes home. I may have to even consider moving as living in a City is hardly the place for my daughter to get well.

Lets hope I finally get a date for that tribunal this week as it is not fair on Elizabeth.

When you have been treated like this all along you start to think all kinds of things and begin to mistrust. I thought this was a civilised country – the care of mental health patients is not right for everyone. There are those who get on and are happy to take the drugs, there are others who complain of serious side effects and suffer from Akathisia but they are forced to continue to take the drugs. This is inhumane.

Diet could be a factor – a patient discharged from hospital after a long-term stay does not get enough support in the community and if that person is not eating correctly they can easily go downhill. Even the food in hospital leads a lot to be desired and there are no assessments to see if someone is food intolerant or lacking in essential nutrients. Correct nutrition can “cure” a lot of behavioural problems. Someone so drugged up is unable to look after themselves and needs more help and support especially with on a day to day basis nutritious food.

It is really dragging on now the time/date for the Tribunal to be arranged and I have been on the telephone to my solicitors today who are still waiting to hear from the Welsh Tribunals Office who have not responded to them.
I feel sorry for my daughter that she has no news and is still stuck in hospital on section that can in effect take 9 years to overturn and I know of people still under section for more than this length of time. The longer someone is in hospital, the more dependant that person becomes on the team and the more institutionalised they become -the harder it is for them to cope in the community. There should be different types of therapeutic communities set up to help someone rather than just put that person back into the community where they are vulnerable for instance and likely to suffer further abuse. Not everyone took drugs in the first instance, some were abused and these vulnerable people might benefit from care away from the local area where they can establish friendship and be supported properly rather than in a scheme where there is supposed to be 24 hr care and an individual flat – this kind of scheme is good for some but not for others who have been in a hospital for years. The support given is not adequate that allows a patient to live off junk food and not be supported appropriately. A therapeutic community could provide a nutritionist, a doctor, nursing staff, can include peer support from suitable former patients and involve ordinary people from the community as well as student psychologists/nurses and the care should be holistic by way of choice. If someone is happy to take the drugs and they work as Dr Walsh says they may be undermethylated but others may feel differently and Root and Branch have the right idea. I may contact them tomorrow to see how they are getting on with their project as this kind of thing would be ideal for my daughter. I do not feel that coming back to a noisy City is the right option for Elizabeth right now. I as a mother do not want her to go downhill again but neither do I wish for her to be controlled in such a way that a team tries to turn her against me as a mother. Even if a team does not like you it is wrong for them to influence or deny contact or say things that are not nice and my daughter may well have been successful at her Tribunal if the team had not intervened and persuaded her to replace her very good local solicitors with a Welsh Firm.

So far things have been dragged out and this has been going on since before the end of last year. I found out on appointing my solicitors that a further attempt was being made to replace me as Nearest Relative. This means my daughter is being pitched between myself and her father – this is extremely damaging to my daughter and you can judge by this comment the effect it has on her “I will call the police on them, Mum, you are still my Mum” Anyway, I have been waiting to hear from my solicitors the date for the Tribunal for 2 weeks now it has been decided roughly a date that is convenient to the independent doctor, myself and the rest of the family together with my solicitor. We shall all be going to Wales for the Tribunal and I cannot believe that the Welsh Tribunal Office has not responded to my solicitors. So I decided to ring them myself to see what was going on. The person I spoke to refused to give me the name of the person dealing with matters saying that this person was off from work. I complained that things were dragging on and that there were errors which led to further delays which was not good enough. I referred to a mistake in which the Tribunal was lodged as one being brought by my daughter and not me – this then had to be re-arranged. The team tried to drag things out further by saying that my daughter had not consented to see the independent doctor but it was common knowledge that she wanted to be off the section and after all she is no risk to the public. My younger daughter is witness to all of this and spoke to her sister and got signed consent – after all it is her right to have a fair trial and if she is not happy being on a section then neither am I as Nearest Relative. So, then only recently and most shockingly everyone except for me, my solicitors and the independent doctor would have turned up at the tribunal which had been arranged – this is ludicrous what is going on – when I found out by accident I turned up at the hospital and asked what time and you should have seen their faces. To think everyone but me knew – there is a complete lack of communication between the team and social services. It is a good job I found out and then staff did not seem to be aware of my rights – I was told I could not cancel this date. So I turned around and said I would immediately cancel and this I did through my solicitors who were equally shocked at this being arranged. With these mistakes being made on hearing that my solicitors were still waiting for a reply from this office I decided to ring them today. I telephoned and got no information whatsoever but said to the team that I wanted to have that date next week otherwise I would be referring matters to The Rt Hon Norman Lamb MP. This is a matter for the Department of Health to look into and there is no decent complaints procedure – every time I have complained the complaint has been closed without any satisfactory answers so this is why I am going right to the top. I have told the Welsh Tribunals office that public money is being wasted here and the public had a right to know about it and I am more than happy to let the public know what is really going on. So, I shall make sure that I telephone the Welsh Tribunals Office on Monday for that date and if a date is not forthcoming in that week then I wish the world to know about it.

The other people I have been dealing with this week has been Social Services. I am down to 1 social worker now but it would seem there is always the Manager shadowing matters here. I got in touch as I had been speaking to my solicitors about future placements which would ultimately be my daughter’s choice. It is hardly a satisfactory situation for her to be under a hospital even if the facilities are nice – my daughter should not be on a section and they are keeping her as a prisoner because only under a section can my daughter be completely controlled by the team in terms of taking the drugs they prescribe even if the drugs are doing her no good and are detrimental to her health under a hospital the team continue to push these drugs regardless of anything else. What kind of care is this? Having said all of this my daughter is on Clozapine and I am not qualified to take her off the drugs and would not encourage her to stop taking them as she could die as a result. To come off this serious quantity of drugs she would need professional help. There are experts that can help but no facilities – only illicit drugs are worthy of these facilities so a person is told they have to take the drugs for the rest of their lives and when my daughter complained of serious side effects she just got completely ignored despite the leaflets that go with the drugs that say refer to your physician if you experience such symptoms. In a hospital setting the staff want to keep someone drugged up as they are less trouble. The care is completely wrong in the UK that is for sure and I believe that acute wards should not be used for long term or repetitive admissions – at least choice should be given to the patient.

Anyway, here is my recent email to the Department of Health – For the Attention of the Ministerial Correspondence and Public Enquiries Officer:

“I am afraid I did not receive the reply from Mr Lamb and would be grateful if you could email this to me.

I’m being contacted by no end of other mothers, some whose sons/daughters are on neverending sections on huge dosage of drugs. They are written off like rubbish and there is no way on earth I want my daughter to end up in the system for 26 years. The whole care system, law and especially the manipulation of capacity /confidentiality needs looking at that allows establishments whether it be NHS or private to keep hold of someone for years on end. It should not be allowed that a psychiatrist or social services can manipulate matters trying to get rid of you as Nearest Relative by bullying and harrassment. I have not been treated fairly and neither has my daughter and just because I have complained because so many serious things have happened following the initial incident the team do not like this and have sought to replace me several times. All this is wasting public money. I have done extensive research on the drugs and can find virtually nothing in the UK on offer unlike in Tornio, Finland. I would willingly take my daughter over there for decent care. I have noticed there are some therapeutic communities and feel this is the answer for choice rather than acute wards which can be very distressful for some but they do not go far enough to offer the care I would like with proper assessments by Dr Walsh. He is coming over in November to train up 20 doctors and I would like the Dept of Health to Contact Chy Sawel to see how they can help. I do not accept treatment resistant as a diagnosis. In fact I cannot accept any of the diagnoses and want a proper assessment and have paid for this to be done which shows shocking results. I have gone to lengths to try and provide decent care myself but have been treated like a criminal. You are treated even worse as a patient and I meet with a group of such former patients who have a lot to offer. Still a date for the Tribunal has not been arranged and I would like Chy Sawel set up urgently in order that my daughter can have the correct care and diagnosis.

The above is just a small part of the email I have written and I am awaiting their response with interest. I hope it is not going to be the usual standard kind of response that brings nothing and no hope in anything being addressed properly. I have further described how wrong it is to force drug patients and pin them down – this is terrible – that person could be having terrible side effects and t here are no facilities to properly help that person. All the more reason to have Chy Sawel and Root and Branch set up. I have said that I am so keen to see this happen that I would pay for the advertising myself for the 20 doctors needed by Dr Walsh.

Since writing this email, I have been contacted by yet more mothers who are in despair and it is not just me – all the more reason for the Dept of Health to take seriously my letters/emails and do something about the situation.

Tomorrow I shall be busy catching up on chores and meeting up with a close friend. I was so hoping to have some good news on the date of the tribunal to tell Elizabeth but there is nothing. I am very disappointed.

Amanda has been in the news a lot lately and I cannot get over the ignorance of some people and especially those in the media.  It is unbelievable how cruel and ignorant some people are and I suggest they read the following books:   Dr Ann Blake Tracy – Prozac Panacea Pandora,  Dr Candace Pert, Molecules of Emotion,  Professor David Healy Pharmageddon and Dr William Walsh Nutrient Power.  I would also urge such people to look at Peter Breggin, Dr Joanne Moncrief

It is easy for someone to judge someone else without even meeting the person or their families.

When I met Amanda Bynes I found her extremely nice and very charming to my young daughter who from a very early age has wanted herself to go into acting however I would not wish her to go into such a profession having read the nasty bitchy comments.

Whatever Amanda may have posted on Twitter does not excuse such comments –   I feel sorry for her an her family having read that the care in the US is quite shocking as a whole.  However there are alternative care centres which is something this Country should be looking into.

I do not take Twitter or any other social media site very seriously.  In fact someone so it would seem – a complete stranger to me even questioned the fact I was “angry”.  I have learned that these professionals are always looking for some excuse in order to come out with ridiculous diagnoses.   I found this highly amusing.  

Everyone is entitled to their views and lots of people would not agree with me however  I am going to stick by my opinions that the care in the UK is cruel, abusive and mainly about drug pushing and ECT is given  – this and the drugs can be given under a section forcibly.  A patient can be held down and forced to take the drugs.  I do not know how any professional can do such a job.

It is very sad there is such ignorance in the world and in the UK it simply is not reported accurately.   I must check and make sure that the recent articles concerning myself have been corrected “I DID NOT AGREE  –  THIS IS A BIG MISTAKE TO SAY THAT I RELUCTANTLY AGREED FOR MEDICATION WHICH I CALL CHEMICALS OR DRUGS TO BE GIVEN TO MY YOUNGER DAUGHTER AS A CHILD.    In the files where I have criticised and stuck up for my daughter I have been viewed as a bad mother and they did a full child protection investigation behind my back on me.  Because I was outspoken against the drugging of my daughter as a child it did not go down well with the team.

The reason I am against the drugs is because in both cases counselling should have been given instead.   Even on 1mg of Rispiridal my daughter suffered withdrawal and it seemed to make her worse than ever.  I was shocked at the weight gain.  Anyway I would have liked more of a mention in the article about the drug Rispiridal and there is a Twitter Account I believe by the name of Johnson & Toxin and this is well worth looking at.  Of course I have complained about the drugs to the FDA who do nothing and Professor Healy is right I am sure these drugs are passed in a dubious manner as I have personally seen the shocking effects of them and I am not impressed.     As Dr Walsh says if someone is over methylated the drugs can actually make someone worse.   My daughter might also be suffering from Pyrrole Disorder.  I first had the tests done through Bio Lab when Elizabeth was on a local ward and now I have had them done again.  It is worth every penny to see as proof how these drugs are affecting my daughter and she is stooping and looking disabled.  She is in bed by 8.00 and feels dizzy.  She should be enjoying her life and has been made disabled.

I am  not shocked by the pictures of Amanda Bynes at all and I think it very nasty that they have been published and I am more worried that she will be sent to a shocking institution and be put on even worse chemicals.

I wish I could write to her parents and tell them to take her to see Dr Ann Blake Tracy and Dr Walsh of the Walsh Institute.  Dr Walsh will be coming up with the correct diagnosis and the correct treatment of nutrition.  I do not accept any of the labels especially Chronic Treatment Resistant.

Some people on Twitter are saying that I should be patient.   This is ridiculous as my daughter’s life is at risk.  Why on earth should I be patient when the care is appalling and has made my daughter worse than ever. 

The private hospital where she is now is better with the facilities however the care is just the same in terms of the drugs and I think it is wrong if staff are pushing and bossing my daughter around to get her to do things as how on earth do they know how she is feeling on 800mg of drugs a day. 

“You try taking them Mum”   –  well that says it all.

Because I have quite rightly spoken up for my daughter I have been treated like a criminal. 

I applaud those who speak out like Professor Healy and Dr Ann Blake Tracy.  There are others beginning to question things.  As I stood outside the Institute of Psychiatry a psychiatrist was just going in and took a look at my leaflet with all the 14 drugs or so they have experimented with on my daughter –  his comment was “you are right they do not work.

I am in touch with people who have never felt better now they are off the drugs.  However I still would not be telling anyone to stop taking them but what should be provided for is correct facilities.  It is dangerous to come off the drugs and the people I know who have done it have suffered terrible illness however if someone wants to come off them there should be the facility.  My campaign is about choice and the provision of therapeutic communities where former patients can be employed to help in a proper way like any professional.  Patients have a lot to offer and should not be discarded like rubbish.

The professionals just prescribe the drugs and administer them and then they do not see how these affect someone and how much they are suffering in some cases.

For those who the drugs work all well and good.  Dr Walsh points out in his book that they can work for some people BUT WHAT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER AND OTHERS LIKE HER – some on as much as 1300mg and in hospital who can barely move.

How can such abuse go on in a so called civilised country –  It would seem that the churches and religions of the world do not care about the plight of the most weak and vulnerable people on never ending sections.  Where are these churches in helping such people.  What are they doing to defend the patients – the answer is NOTHING.  Just like the Government there are connections to the pharmaceutical industry – they have abandoned my daughter and others like her. 

It is a paltry amount that carers get to look after someone at home – as my daughter says “there’s no place like home, Mum”  –  the law is manipulated and Tribunals dragged out.  So much for the team’s refusal of me having sight of documents.  Well I have everything ready for court now.  What is more I think these court cases should be made open and that is the whole problem with the current care system.  I am speaking openly and honestly about a subject that many people do not know about and in fact I myself knew nothing about the drugs, about the labelling.  I would advise everyone to take a look at the book DSM5.  (Diagnostic Statistical Manual).  I hope that the parents of Amanda Bynes take her to a therapeutic community such as Cooper RIIs, Alternative to Meds or Earth House and they consult Dr Walsh and Dr Tracy. 

I would further emphasise that my younger daughter suffered trauma and was diagnosed with Schizophrenia as a child and now is on top of the world – this shows that you cannot accept what some experts have to say and I have an interesting take of psychiatrists who say it takes 2 minutes to come up with a diagnosis – another one is stating that a psychiatrist with an empty practice is a psychiatrist without money.  Other experts talk about insurance as labelling is away to get money for benefits and a licence to drug.

I am never going to change my mind on my views here as I have done a lot of research into matters.

I also feel that an acute ward is no place for someone like my daughter or Amanda Bynes to get well and I hope her parents will look into things like I have done.

I have had calls two days running from Elizabeth – some weeks you hear nothing at all. I am not on the phone every minute to her but I do worry when I do not hear anything. If there was something seriously wrong I fear I would be the last person to know. Such is the ruling of confidentiality. I think the whole system is wrong here for there are certain things that a family would wish to know without a team having to make such a song and dance about. I am pretty sure that no one in the team wishes me to see the files. I had a good idea of the sort of thing that can be said behind your back as I have seen past files- however I am not going to worry myself about this for it does not bother me – the team do not know me. The Doctor has not once met me in person despite my daughter being admitted about a year ago. It has been referred in comment by the psychiatrist regarding my “past behaviour”. These comments are just an excuse not to invite me to meetings unlike the rest of the family and initially I was delighted my daughter was referred.

Anyway Elizabeth is clearly missing the family and home. Home though being London is hardly the place to get better as Elizabeth needs a more peaceful environment now. Elizabeth would need a lot of looking after in any case having been in hospital for a long time. I could not leave her in the house alolne but I doubt she will be allowed home – she would need intensive trauma therapy. It is important that Elizabeth becomes confident again and gets the kind of care not available locally, however the care I have seen is abroad in such centres like Earth House and Cooper Riis. I do not feel that it takes a professional to give all the care having seen the reaction of my daughter to have a neighbour knocking on her door asking her to come out for the day. This is the kind of support – friendship and peer support. Professionals I see as very controlling and I suppose they have to be to a certain extent in a hospital – that is why I am keen to see Elizabeth out of hospital – the longer she is in the harder it will be to rehabilitate her. A scheme where there are individual flats may be good for some people but I am keen to see that Elizabeth is not just put in a scheme like the last one. I have seen people go downhill, not eating well, drinking because of solitude and not being able to do basic tasks. Someone like Elizabeth has been made dependent on others and the answer is not that she becomes dependent on me either. However I worry and hope that things work out this time around as you read so many cases of abuse with people working with vulnerable adults and not all get in the papers. I know of cases personally. I also do not think a hospital is the right place for Elizabeth surrounded by other seriously ill patients probably sent there as a last resort.

Elizabeth asked after her pet cat and said she wished to come home but there is nothing I can do right now as we are waiting for the dates of the Tribunal. Things take so long in the UK and it is all very well for some people I am currently speaking to on Twitter to turn around and say things take time. I see it as lack of efficiency in my opinion. I do not agree that nothing could be done about this here and now to get things moving at least. What is wrong in just seeing how things work out with a centre like Chy Sawel being set up with funding an Dr Walsh and other doctors, some of whom are already signed up for the training being involved. What is wrong rather than keep someone in hospital for years and years on end at huge cost to the public.

I know other mothers who are desperate to see change as their sons are drugged up on such a high dosage and can hardly move themselves. I think it is disgusting that the UK allows this kind of treatment when there are possibly better alternatives with Dr Walsh coming over. The mothers I know are professional people – their sons/daughters coming from nice backgrounds.

What is wrong in seeing how a scheme like this works out with volunteers, with former patients being involved, with nutritionists working alongside Dr Walsh. It is easy to experiment on drug after drug at somewhere like the Bethlem however when these drugs do not work a fresh approach needs to be made and centres set up offering therapeutic care rather than forcing patients to take drugs and ECT.

For those patients who get on with the drugs and have had results from ECT – I am not criticising them in any way. If people are happy to take the drugs all well and good.

I am just saying that there are as many who are suffering from serious side effects and would like to see change and this could in turn save a lot of money to the NHS and public if proper centres were set up to help people like this instead of forcing them to forever take the drug that is affecting them badly.

Drugs mask the problem and if that person has been abused or suffered terrible trauma then the drugs will not work and should only be used short term. It is wrong of a psychiatrist to say you have to be on the drugs for the rest of your life however coming off the drugs are dangerous and I would not recommend this to anyone stopping their medication. However if professionals were involved and specialist centres set up then a better look at overall health including nutrition could be the answer. In the UK they do not seem to know how to reduce someone properly in any case and this is where people like Dr Ann Blake Tracy should be involved. Extensive tests like the ones I have had done at the Bio Lab should be given to those patients who do not get on with the drugs and then a choice of care offered. I disagree that such changes cannot be brought about sooner rather than years and years ahead. I and all the other mothers would be more than happy to help implement much needed changes.

I would also like to see the courts involving mental health cases to be open as the public have a right to know what is going on.

I did not know whether Mr Asaria would bother to phone me as I had trouble in even being acknowledged and getting past his PA. However I was pleasantly surprised today when first thing in the morning as promised Mr Asaria did in fact telephone me and dead on time. I would have preferred a visit but this is better than nothing.

I am a firm believer that communication is so very important and how you deal with someone can have either bad or good effect. For instance even is someone cannot give you the answer you need they bother to telephone you. At the weekend I came across a good example of communication under Cambian. My daughter Elizabeth telephoned me to say she had a lump on her head and had been referred to a doctor. I was naturally concerned as no one had said anything but it is all down to confidentiality and that can mean that the family and in my case Nearest Relative do not get to hear vital information. Anyway I telephoned the hospital and a nurse responded to me in a very nice manner unlike some of the response I have had in the past. This nurse obviously had to check with my daughter first before disclosing information but did not make a song and dance over it. I felt that I was treated well.

Also I felt that Mr Asaria dealt with me well too but whether or not he chooses to defend his staff and take sides is another matter as I have seen very defensive behaviour from teams when mistakes have been made and have had very negative responses when the team all try and stick together. I would respect honesty and even if a mistake had been made to own up to it or at least be honest. I am not the kind of person who would just go out there and get a solicitor and take someone to court just like that – the chance would be a fine thing anyway the law is heavily stacked against the weak and vulnerable and it is near impossible to find a lawyer to represent you beyond Tribunal level under mental health. What means far more to m e than any level of so called compensation I/my daughter may be entitled to is good communication. What more can you wish for than proper communication and this is something hard to find under the mental health system.

I appreciate there are many who would like to see change and I know what it is like to be on the receiving end of the worst kind of bullying and that is exclusion. I would rather be called all the names under the sun than suffer this kind of bullying where no one communicates and they erase you from the life of the person you care for even though you may have been distanced from that person. It is harmful trying to get a weakened patient surrounded by the team to take sides against her mother but this has been going on. I am not interested in any team member being reprimanded on this score – all I want is for changes to be made and instead of playing on capacity and confidentiality like they have been against the reforms that Mr Norman Lamb and David Behan want to bring about, it would be nice for the team to be open and honest and provide the next best thing to what is going on in Tornio Finland where they have 95% success rate. Families can often be the cause of distress to the person who is mentally ill but sometimes something may have happened outside of the family in terms of trauma – either way nothing is to be resolved by the current system of exclusion and trying to get rid of the mother as the Nearest Relative without even speaking to that person honestly and openly expressing their views.

I can honestly and openly tell each and every one of you the reason they want rid of me as the Nearest Relative is not because I have abused my daughter but because of my views on the drugs concerned. They think I will influence my daughter to stop taking the drugs or encourage her. Well I am not a doctor so I could not do this. I would not be able to cope and my daughter could die in coming off the level of drugs she is on . She is on the third most dangerous drug Clozapine and all I want is for her to not be held forever on a section that could go on 20 yrs or more as I know some people are stuck in this rotten awful system – not because they are a risk but because there is NOTHING in terms of decent supportive care. I then went on to speak to Mr Asaria about therapeutic communities as this is the answer. I would also like proper assessments done and that is why I have had private tests done which prove the drugs are doing harm and therefore a fresh approach needs to be made as far as nutrition goes. Yes it does work as I appointed private orthomolecular psychiatrist qualified to give both drugs and other therapies. I have never seen my daughter look so happy. I am thrilled that HRH Prince Charles has spoken out. I had written to him personally about my daughter’s shocking care at the Bethlem – it means so much that he has spoken out on this subject and he is quite correct. I saw a marked improvement – just to listen to my daughter saying how happy she was to not be dismissed. That says it all but then I was banned from the scheme when I spotted an email asking her social worker to be reduced off the drugs – none of my influence whatsoever in this and I demanded a copy. It was then difficult to administer the private prescription from the private orthomolecular doctor I appointed myself and it was for this reason I had to give up my police training as this clashed with the course I was on.

I congratulate Mr Asaria for listening politely to what I had to say – a mere mother but one who is prepared to speak out and fight to get changes implemented. I am not a professional but am in touch with some who have given me wonderful advice and led me to research into the drugs and what is available in terms of care and there is certainly a void in care. People kept on a section for years on end cannot manage in the community but why on earth should they be confined to a hospital when there should be choice and alternatives. These patients are written off as nothing when I do not believe that anyone should be written off. I believe that there could be more done to provide a choice in care not based on research but based on a patient’s wishes as at the end of the day everyone is individual and not everyone gets on with the drugs. Not everyone responds well to the shocking care on acute wards. Some patients like my daughter need peace and quiet to get well and rebuilt their confidence with peer support rather than strict domineering control of professionals and I am not for one minute saying all professionals are bad but I want patients included and to be made to feel worthwhile and not just written off and made to feel like nothing as I do as the mother they want rid of.

I hope that Mr Asaria does not just discount my comments and it leads to a bitter battle in court – whilst this is a secret court which I disagree with I think the public should know what is going on after all it is provided by public money. I just want things to be fair from now on that is all.

Call for open investigations into deaths of mental health patients | Mental Healthy.

You are overturning the apple cart.
I have to watch my reputation in here.
It is very strict, Mum, you have to go along with the team. I have my reputation to watch. Don’t embarrass me Mum things get back to me.
Dr ………………….said ………………………………………… (cannot disclose prior to court)
Dr …………………. said ………………………………………….. (cannot disclose prior to court)
Letter received from Manager of Hospital – stating supervised calls at Elizabeths request on a weekly basis.
“Don’t tell your mother” In relation to a visit to her grandparents where I was excluded.
Why have I got all these letters from Welsh solicitors, Mum?
“you are interfering with the care, Mum – everything you say gets back to me”.
“I’ve got to go now”
“I am on 15 minute watch”
“You don’t know how things are in here”
“I am not allowed out without a member of staff accompanying me”
“how is Fluffy the cat”
“I miss home and I miss you Mum”
“I’ve got to go now”
“It has not been possible to connect your call” “Has anyone discouraged you from speaking to me” “Yes ……………but I cannot say whom”.

“Do you really want your Mum to be the Nearest Relative”

I have not heard from my daughter Elizabeth all week. The phone does not ring these days – the conversations are awkward like never before.

I am not the only one experiencing this – the rest of the family have said the same and they were favoured by the team but lately they do not get invited to the CPAs either.

I am not the only one who has experienced this.

Phone forever charging in the office at one point.

It is for a reason that a patient is moved far away from home and family and that is to take complete control and to sever family relationships. This is not what Elizabeth would have wanted and even if she is brainwashed into saying things against me as a mother I understand that she is under pressure.

When you complain the team then make out it is the wish of that person and I understand how intimidating it must be for my daughter to be faced with a team who are against me as a mother.

I can honestly say this is true as I now have the paperwork to back up my claims.

Instead of working with you as a parent, picking up the phone and speaking to you, instead of letting you know even basic information like Elizabeth had a nice day – there is silence. You cannot always get through on the phone and if the mobile is not answered you have to wait on the other end of the phone.

Yesterday I was in Whole Foods and tried to organise some food to be delivered as I do not see my daughter that often but unfortunately this could not be done. I then thought of a plant but the nice plants were not in plastic pots which would not be allowed on the ward. Instead I had some photos done of the cat. Right from the very beginning it was evident I was being excluded by the team. It then came out when my solicitors were appointed that all the time they were trying to get me replaced. Well I am not surprised they want me replaced as I have knowledge of the drugs and have appointed a good representative in court. However even that is not guarantee to get the section released and she could be stuck in hospital for years to the point of being very much disabled.

I would not be writing these truthful comments openly for everyone to read if I had been included and if the team had communicated openly and honestly with me from the beginning.

I have also taken to Twitter to discuss openly and honestly a subject that is not treated openly and honestly. Little do the public know the full facts and what is really going on.

There is much in the way of secrecy and cover up when you are dealing with mental health patients in particular confidentiality and capacity are played upon to exclude families. This is particularly evident if you dare to disagree with the care.

Elizabeth is under private sector care funded by the Local Authority and it must be costing a fortune and in addition she has two social workers as well. These social workers do not pick up the phone and communicate. They spend all their time going to meetings and discussing you behind your back so it would appear. I have asked who my daughter’s new social worker is but my email has been ignored. The social services make out they do not know what is going on but I know someone from the local area has been attending the meetings at the hospital and then they make out they know nothing. Well I have invited myself to the next CPA – three emails have been ignored and then I pressed for the date and time and finally got a response however I had to then check that I was allowed to go as this response did not give that impression.

Anyway, the facilities and the “care” in terms of outings and food – well this is a world apart from the local facilities. The fact is to refer someone to a private hospital such as this is I believe a last resort when everything has failed which it has done.

My criticism is not of the nurses as they are just doing their job but my criticism lies with the drugs which are continually given on a daily basis at 800mg and one is off label for so called weight loss not tried and tested. My criticism is with the person/people who are behind the distancing of relationships as I see.

I have the legal papers that state clearly that I am not fit to be nearest relative and this is because I have shown opposition to the drugs being given. This is because my daughter has had 14 mind altering drugs and yet still comes out with comments that reveal she remembers way back. The drugs mask the problem and simply have not worked as the underlying causes have not been addressed properly. Physically we have all noticed my daughter is going downhill. I also have private test results to prove this.

The longer spent at this hospital the more dependant but the team do not care as it is about control and money – the longer someone is under their “care” the better as money is being provided for this purpose and that person cannot then just return back to the local area/environment – there are a lack of suitable facilities in the community in this country and something should be done about it.

A hospital is not a good place to get better however Elizabeth would need one to one care.

What mother would be happy for someone to remain under the care of a hospital when you get to hear things said behind your back that are not very nice.

It is a shame this sort of thing goes on and I am not alone here either.

I am being more outspoken than most because I would like to see change In the current system and I am not the only one. I am in touch with many mothers in the same position. The taxpayer is paying a fortune for the forgotten “victims of the pharmaceutical industry” who are on never ending sections yet are not violent in many cases. Noone should be written up as treatment resistant. If there were decent places such as Chy Sawel and Root and Branch etc then there would be no problems. Places where patients are treated with respect not like currently are available.

I have had letters sent privately from readers of my blog which I would not disclose which are truly shocking.

I have had supportive comments and critical as well. I do not mind criticism at all – it is a good thing to speak openly and honestly. This is precisely what is wrong with the current care system – lack of honest and open communication.

I would like to see those patients who are locked away, not violent but in hospital forever being given the support they need in the community but this of course would require funding but how much does it cost to keep them in hospital with the only care of drugs and what cost will this be to the NHS when that person becomes physically ill. There are many people trapped on never ending sections and Tribunals are dragged out and manipulated – costing the public money. Elizabeth’s Tribunal should have taken place much much earlier. The issues have been on changing solicitors to that recommended by the hospital. There was no way on earth Elizabeth herself would have changed a perfectly good local firm of solicitors if it was not for the team’s influence. That is because she had given consent for me to see information but all I was interested in was the drugs however the team did not want me to have any information at all. If there was something major wrong that Elizabeth actually had diabetes for instance this is another reason the team do not want me to see the files and have ignored previous consents from Elizabeth in this respect.

Then came the delays in Elizabeth agreeing to the independent doctor coming to see her and the involvement of Dr Walsh for private tests. It took a visit from her sister which immediately brought about agreement as Elizabeth is not happy being on a section – the team tried to make out she was undecided all the time about the independent doctor visiting. This must be wasting a lot of public money. So all along Elizabeth has been deprived of the holistic care choice of Wales and forced to take the drugs prescribed by the Bethlem even though one is being given off label-not even tried and tested for the purpose.

The last time I spoke to Elizabeth she felt “up and down”. Now the rest of the family are concerned having seen what they think is Elizabeth declining. She suffers regular panic attacks and anxiety.

The team would love it if I was to come along to their CPA and in the slightest way show that I am distressed or unhappy. If I was to do that then they would immediately put a stop to me having contact making out that it was affecting Elizabeth.

This team has not worked with the family as a whole especially me from the very beginning.

This team could be goverened by behaving in such a way as social services/local Primary Care Trust locally are funding things. Either way I could not help but detect that there was awkwardness about the situation some members of staff were placed in but they have to go along with orders or else – or else they will be subject to bullying like I have. Exclusion = bullying.

Meanwhile I will end with the comments of my daughter:

“there is no place like home, Mum”

No doubt Elizabeth under pressure from a team who do not like me may have come out with other comments against me which could be used as a tool by the team to further distance me in hoping I would step back as a mother. I have parts of the file going right back so I know what goes on – questions by the team prompting an answer such as “does your mother hit you?” If someone then replies yes that has gone on then the team do not question the patient however in an environment such as a hospital a patient is put under pressure and when such comments were evident in the file and shown by her sister, Elizabeth admitted there was no truth in these comments at all but at the time of being asked by the professional she was angry as she felt I had put her in hospital. I have heard comments “You’ve put me here” more than once but that is not the case and Elizabeth has blocked memory as to what exactly happened – events leading up to admission. Negative comments in any form against me as a mother will no doubt be used in court – court that is held in secret – how fair is such a system where courts are held in secret?

I hope this blog highlights what is wrong with the system as it stands. It is all down to communication and should not depend on whether a doctor or a professional likes you or not.

There is so much in the legal papers that are untrue – I think I know everything without even having access to the files apart from if they are giving extra drugs on top – the problem the team have with me is I am not in favour of the drugging of my daughter but that does not mean I would encourage her to stop or attempt to take her off them. They are just using this a one big excuse in my opinion and I am bringing out into the open the kind of cases brought in secrecy under mental health tribunal and I am getting a lot of support from patients/mothers and even some experts.

Anyway I now have a lot to sort out and will be going to my meeting later today and also I have the old lady to think of right now to try and get something sorted out about wishes which would need assistance as her wish is for help to be able to walk again and that would involve moving furniture.

Since writing this I have heard from Elizabeth and rang her back. I was worried on hearing that a lump was discovered on her head but when I rang the hospital they did not say it was anything serious but it certainly gave me a lot to think of – if something serious was to happen to Elizabeth at Cambian I wonder if I would be informed as all the time there has been virtually no information given directly and you only get to hear things indirectly. Like at the Bethlem when an emergency doctor was called out -not one member of staff bothered to ring you – I only got to hear via Elizabeth herself.

When a team do not like you, you know this as their way of dealing with you is one of exclusion. Then the team will involve the patient as an excuse. A patient can feel intimidated into going along with whatever the team want and if a team headed by a psychiatrist who does not like you feels that it is best to have less contact then the team take the phone away and it is forever charging in the office.

I noticed a drastic change in everything the minute Elizabeth was transferred miles away from home to Cambian who have won Best Care Provider two years running 2012 and 2013.

Despite my feelings about the Bethlem Elizabeth had her telephone and was constantly texting me. All this has now ceased.

A patient is weakened and vulnerable on 800mg of mind altering drugs ie 300mg Clozapine which is highly sedatory and 500mg of Metformine (given off label so they say for weight loss, however Dr Ann Blake Tracy says it is to counteract diabetes (protection for themselves) the team are adamant she does not have diabetes but then again I have not seen the file. This was another thing that the hospital stepped in to ensure I had no access to the files – again this was done by using my daughter as the tool in terms of manipulation as Elizabeth had already given consent on more than one occasion at the Bethlem and each time access was denied. If the team have written nasty things about me as a mother like I have seen in previous files again they are protecting themselves or else maybe they do not want me to see if there is something seriously wrong. Elizabeth was always quite open and told me that emergency doctors had come out to her at the time she was put on Clozapine. The team can exercise secrecy as when they do not want you included they just ignore you and concentrate on others in the family who are not outspoken and favoritise.

People have said to me that you have to toe the line with the team and act in a certain way so as not to upset them however they are the professionals and I am the mother. They are the ones benefitting from having my daughter and others under their care and the more disabled they are the better.

The more someone is drugged up and like a zombie the easier it is for the team to control that person.

I have once or twice telephoned Elizabeth and she has not been happy – she has said “I do not know what to do with myself, Mum” “you put me here” – well these last comments are not true because the team placed my daughter miles away from home but I must admit I did want her out of the Bethlem in desperation to the hospital she is currently under as I had read such wonderful things. However I did not know she would be so far away from home for a start. They have better facilities for sure and are in a better location, more peaceful that London, I do not think Elizabeth is happy certainly due to the fact she is on section – treated like a prisoner and she has admitted to feeling up and down. She has said things like the Doctor is protecting her – I have heard third party via her sister some other very disturbing comments too. The problem is the team are very loyal and I think afraid to speak out because otherwise they would lose their jobs. Some of the nurses openly praised the doctor concerned however I have now got the evidence to go before the court.

I have today written an email copying everyone in including social services at local level and the Head Office of Cambian who appear not to care less. The last time I spoke to Elizabeth she said she wished I could be there at the next CPA – I have never once been invited to a CPA or included unlike other family members from the very beginning, from well before I started writing on my blog. I had so far been writing about the Bethlem but the doctor concerned has highly praised this hospital as being worldwide renowned and that is where in one conversation I noticed she brought the discussion to an abrupt halt. I was denied everything but escorted and supervised visits and then on complaining about the phone I received a letter stating supervised phone calls at a time I could not ring at the request of my daughter and she has said in front of the family that this was not true. In fact all the time she was texting. It is only now that the texts have stopped and the conversation was last awkward as though she was in a hurry to get off the phone “I must go now” At Xmas Elizabeth was brought down like a prisoner by two nurses escorted all the time and I did a party for her with people present who have known her since a baby. The two nurses who were very nice were no doubt there to report back to this doctor on anything negative which would have led to a ban on my daughter seeing me. Elizabeth had just 3 hours and spent most of the time travelling in the car. The same visit was provided to the rest of the family but without the escorts staying all the time. Then on her Birthday only the rest of the family saw my daughter – I was not included at all and my younger daughter was told not to tell me. Briefly a change in doctor was provided at Cambian and this doctor was very nice and returned my calls. He may not have agreed with me but still allowed the assessment to be done at the Bio Lab for Dr Walsh as I was most concerned about the drugs being given. Many psychiatrists stick together and back one another in terms of prescription drugs – however some are beginning to question whether they do in fact work and the risk factors involved. I very much appreciated the way this doctor responded to me and communicated effectively.

I have been trying to find out about the date/time of the CPA but no one has responded after 3 requests which led me to contact Head Office who have also ignored me but today finally I have that information but have yet to hear from social services. There is a wall of silence there. There is also a wall of silence at Cambian’s Head Office. I thought that if the team did not want me present at the CPA that I could have a video link or conference call arranged through head office so that I could join in the meeting but it is bad when Head Office do not return calls, dismiss you like you are nothing. If I was a celebrity that would be a different matter. So this is the reason why the team want to keep my daughter – so they can continue drugging her on the same level of drugs prescribed by the Bethlem regardless of her health or anything else. A section makes it easier for the team to do whatever they like as this is the law of the UK and the professionals are clearly above the law. It is no wonder they can laugh. The reason the team do not like me is because I have been outspoken against the drugs but my daughter was put on this so called wonder drug Clozapine against her wishes and I complained at the Bethlem – “I have heard all about your past behaviour” – these are comments said by the current doctor when I ran down the Bethelm.

I feel the team are distancing the relationship between myself and my daughter and no doubt would be happy if I was not around. I know for a fact that they wish me not to be the nearest relative and think of me as an unfit. As an “unfit” mother I have gone out of my way to research all the dangerous drugs my daughter has been on. I now have strong evidence I cannot disclose in my blog prior to the forthcoming court case. I have also gone out of my way to find good representation in court. All the advice I obtained was from professional experts but the team just like the Bethlem are not interested.

My concern is that if the team carry on as they are doing giving drugs at this level I will lose my daughter.

I think the whole care system in the UK is rotten and rife with bullying – these the drugs are like a life sentence and given to someone who may have been suffering trauma as a result of a terrible incident for instance instead of trauma therapy. The drugs and care received by my daughter have not only destroyed her but affected the whole family. The whole family are lately concerned by what they witness as decline. I have always questioned the labels and the fact she did not seem to benefit from any of the drugs – they have made her worse. At 26 my daughter should be enjoying herself but cannot do much as she has been made disabled on a cocktail of toxic drugs. There is nothing I can do – I would not say this to my daughter as it would only upset her and neither would I encourage her to stop taking them as I know she could die as a result. A section can be extended for 9 years and the longer the more institutionalised someone becomes to the point they become completely helpless and disabled.

It is shocking there are no facilities to help someone be reduced if a drug is not working in the UK. It is shocking that the care means another drug has to be given in place rather than a proper drug free period. Prof Robin Murray promised a drug free period of assessment but instead she got Clozapine and I was told “you should have done your research – it is all about Clozapine here” – I cannot do anything for Elizabeth right now but fear she is not going to get better if a doctor is working against me rather than with me. I am disappointed with everything as this was not what I was expecting.

Anyway, I have not been refused the chance to go to the CPA on this occasion but this has come about in such a way that is so very sad and I wish I could move to Finland where I know my daughter would receive good care in a place called Tornio and I would be truly happy as a mother as they have open dialogue there and it is no wonder they have such a high success rate. Unlike in the UK families are included.

Lastly I think that therapeutic communities could be the answer to help some that are classed as untreatable providing they have a lot of support and I would like to see more patient involvement. Whilst a therapeutic community may not work for everyone same as the drugs, same as the acute wards, this would give much needed choice to patients and if they could model this on Finland, Tornio’s success with open dialogue and include families instead of exclude then I would be truly happy.

Since writing this I have heard from Head Office and hope to speak to Mr Asaria on Monday.