I am not normally the kind of person to attend such an event as a demonstration but I brought along three friends to this event as all feel as strongly as I do that reform needs to be made under the apalling mental health care system.

The group Speak Out Against Psychiatry I had in fact not heard of before but they had seen my very basic website and felt strongly about holding such a protest as this hospital is well known to some people who they are aware of.

We arrived at about 11.00 am and the protest ended at 2.00 pm – this event was properly organised and done so in a very professional manner.   I would urge everyone to take a look at the website of Speak Out Against Pscyhiatry. 

I spoke to members of the press about how apalling the “care” had been and how patients are treated in this so called renowned worldwide hospital (a better description would be a prison camp).    I held up to the cameras the wonderful books that I had brought onto the ward for the team to read and learn from:

Dr Ann Blake Tracy –  Prozac Panacea Pandora

David Healy – Pharmageddon

Dr Candace Pert –  the creator of these monstrous drugs to which she fully admits.

Members of Speak Out for Psychiatry come from all over the country but then this so called renowned hospital takes people from all over the country and from abroad and people think they are going to fabulous place where they are going to get the very best of care.  

I feel that the protest was a success as it brought attention at a time when the psychiatrists were visiting and meetings were being held on the ward.  

I took time to speak to the Police to explain the whole situation and I know for a fact their training is good as regards mental health patients, having been on the course myself however it is a pity they do not have powers to act – this is governed by the law which seems to be in favour of the psychiatrists.

These psychiatrists who ply patients with harmful drugs and experiment on them at this so call renowned hospital against their wishes think they are above the law.  My daughter is now on Clozapine and I understand she has phoned other family members in distress at times and it looks like things are not going well with this drug.  Having read the research papers it is truly horrible what is going on here at this dreadful hospital.

My daughter is now a long way away and probably they panicked.  For the NHS to move someone so quickly on the spur of the moment   – this is so unusual!  Perhaps they are hoping I will cease to take an interest but how wrong they are.  I am not the kind of person to turn my back as there are other patients left here that need to be thought about.   

I have obtained some more apalling research papers and cannot wait to get the file under Data Protection Act that I was previously refused.

I will hold this hospital responsible for anything that happens to my daughter as it would appear from the rest of the family that she is not getting on too well on the Clozapine.  She has telephoned in a disorientated state of mind and obviously this is yet another drug that is not working at all.

TOGETHER ENFIELD MENTAL HEALTH AND SLAM HAVE PUSHED DRUGS LEFT RIGHT AND CENTRE AT MY DAUGHTER.  ENFIELD MENTAL HEALTH SOCIAL SERVICES HAVE ALSO GOT INVOLVED IN TRYING TO PERSUADE HER TO GO ON CLOZAPINE.  WHAT BUSINESS IS IT OF A SOCIAL WORKER TO TRY AND PERSUADE SOMEONE TO TAKE CLOZAPINE.  WHAT GOOD IS CLOZAPINE AS WHEN READING THE RESEARCH PAPERS YOU REALLY SEE JUST HOW HARMFUL THIS DRUG IS.

WHAT GOOD IS NICE WHEN THEIR GUIDELINES DO NOT PROTECT THE PATIENT. 

I HAVE MORE RESEARCH PAPERS WHICH I WILL SHARE WITH YOU ALL TOMORROW.

I hope this protest will be one of many and what we need is as many people as possible to speak out against the injustice of what is going on in psychiatry.

I want to know and see proof of a diagnosis and was amazed when the Consultant Psychiatrist mentioned he likes to start afresh.    I was stunned when I saw an interview on a dvd by another Consultant Psychiatrist from Maudsley who says it takes 2 minutes to come up with a diagnosis. 

IT IS ALL A BIG CON.   IF THERE IS NO CERTAINTY OR PROOF AS TO THE DIAGNOSES – WHAT RIGHT DO THESE PEOPLE HAVE TO EXPERIMENT ON OTHERS WHO, FROM WHAT I CAN SEE ARE THE MOST HIGHLY INTELLIGENT PEOPLE, AGAINST THEIR WISHES.  A BREAKDOWN CAN BE CAUSED BY A  TRAUMATIC EVENT, WORK PRESSURE, BULLYING AND ABUSE.   I HAVE SEEN SOMEONE IN MY FAMILY GET BETTER AFTER SEVERAL MONTHS WITHOUT ANY DRUG INTERVENTION –  JUST TIME WAS NEEDED.   BUT COUNSELLING AND CBT ARE ALSO GOOD.  HYPNOTHERAPY WHICH MAY NOT BE APPROVED BY SOME – THIS WORKED AND SHE CAME OUT A DIFFERENT PERSON.  AT LEAST THIS IS NOT DRUG INTERVENTION AND WHEN SHE ASKED TO GO BACK FOR MORE THAT SAID IT ALL.  EVEN THE CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST SAID IT WOULD RELAX HER SO WHY IS THIS NOT WIDELY GIVEN UNDER THE NHS AS A CHOICE FOR PATIENTS WHEN IT IS AVAILABLE UNDER THE NHS.

Today Elizabeth corresponded by text and tonight we spoke on the telephone very late.  She said it is a nice place and the food is lovely but I am concerned.  Cambian are still dishing out harmful drugs and I am worried there is something wrong with Elizabeth’s health as she has complained of some serious effects from this drug Clozapine.  I may have to insist on an independent doctor examining her.   I am very very concerned for her indeed after tonight’s phone call.

I know the countryside and area is lovely but it is a disgrace how the teams did this without allowing her time to say goodbye to family.  Why the rush –  why the panic. 

I am so bitter towards this hospital and the way they  have behaved that I would be happy to give huge worldwide publicity.   On Friday there may well be the opportunity and I intend to make the most of it.

From what I gather Elizabeth has not got half her possessions.  I need to ring the ward tomorrow and find out where they are.

Tonight they have her 2 Lorazepam tablets and this is no good so I will have to have a word with the staff there at Cambion as I thought they were not all about pushing drugs.   It is the NHS cruel wicked care that does just that and then patients are forced to take these chemicals under a section. 

I do not know how long she will be there but she said it is lovely, like a 4 star hotel and food is good.  I am distressed and sorry for my daughter after the phone call I heard from her today.

I feel so helpless now but bitter towards them all for just pushing drug afte drug and not solving anything and how is this affecting the health of my poor daughter.  I must insist on an independent doctor visiting my daughter after tonight’s phone call.

Whilst I am happy Elizabeth is in a nice place albeit a long way away from the family,  I had a distressing phone call from her late at night today.  She complained of severe pains and feels there is something wrong with her heart/liver.   She had to ask for Lorazepam and of course staff gave her this.  I will have to ring them tomorrow as I am not happy as I thought the idea of this place was not to drug people up – I thought Cambian was different.  With the high level of drugs given to my daughter I have every right to be worried.   SLAM could not have cared less and I cannot wait to talk to the press on Friday and tell them exactly what I think.

There are others who also feel strongly about SLAM – for instance there are patients who are most upset about their treatment at this awful place.

Meanwhile I do not know what has happened to all the possessions of Elizabeth –  the lovely oils, the other things seem to have been left behind.  I am now going to write to the very woman – Clinical Service Lead Inpatient Complex Care  to see if she can enlighten me on what has happened to her possessions.   This is the heartless woman who would not let Elizabeth have a couple of items she requested on the ward when they banned me.   I have now decided to deal directly with her on every occasion as a result of her attitude.

Spent this morning clearing out possessions from Elizabeth’s flat and then went to meet some new friends with shared desire to see better mental  health care in place.

One good thing about this terrible situation is the fact I have met so many nice people.

Elizabeth seems very very happy.  The four star wards are a far cry from the local acute wards.  The environment is peaceful and the countryside is beautiful.  The good is brilliant and she is extremely happy. 

The reason I believe Cambion has got things right is because they listen to the patient. and the patient instead of being dismissed is involved.   There are many other things not available under local NHS acute wards.

Obviously things were done terribly by SLAM and hastily she was moved without me being able to say goodbye. 

She is a fair distance away but I am so h appy she is in a decent place. 

One good thing is that my basic website not only helps me keep a record of what is going on with Elizabeth’s care but as a result of this and by using Facebook I have come into contact with such marvellous people who I feel I have known for years and have true understanding of what things are really like under the awful mental health system.  I am told it is such people like patients leading newspapers want to hear from.  I think it is extremely brave of any patient to speak out against this abuse.  Anyway I am glad I have made so many nice friends as a result in campaigning for better mental health care.

I received a telephone call from Elizabeth tonight and she was very happy.  The ward she described as like a luxury hotel.  The food she described as delicious and very good.

The peacefulness of the environment is good for someone who stressed out and unwell.  The local acute wards are apalling –  Cambion 4 Star Wards are what is needed.   ALL WARDS SHOULD BE LIKE CAMBION FOUR STAR WARDS. 

It would have been nice to have been told about the move for my daughter away from home and away from where she is currently – in fact a long distance away.   I could at least do the journey in a day where she is now but it is so very awful.   Anyway, the move took place today and I had a string of phone calls yesterday but was unable to take them as I was working.  Fancy just giving a day’s notice.  What kind of behaviour is this.  It is cruel and horrible of them not to give at least a week’s notice so that I could have said goodbye to my daughter.

I would be willing to provide and send Elizabeth to another country if there was decent care.  For instance Tornio in Finland is supposed to have unique care and I would have been happy to try and provide this as there is no decent care here.  The care I have in mind is minimal drugs with diet, nutrition emphasised.  Orthomolecular care is what I would like most of all.

She is being moved somewhere nicer but I cannot help but feel this has been done very hastily.  It is unusual for the team to act so quickly.  Why are they panicking so  – is it because of the good work of the new advocate I appointed in place of Rethink.  It made my day when I turned up for the meeting on Saturday with the n ew advocate.

Well I would not like to disappoint anyone at SLAM as there are other patients languishing on that hell on earth ward and one poor patient has been there for 2 years –  I asked a nurse how long patients were left on their ward for and what was the longest time and this is the response I got.  I was horrified.  It was bad enough visiting let alone being a patient.  This is no decent place to get better it is enough to make anyone suffer nightmares.    I will continue to take an interest in things and cannot wait to get my files.   This could be another factor why they have panicked – I am sure they have all said lovely things about me.

However I would not like to disappoint the team and turn my back.  I feel it my duty to continue to take a keen interest  in this hospital.  I want to know exactly how the Consultant Psychiatrist has come up with his diagnosis.  I want evidence.

I also want the files not just here but locally too.

I have not mentioned the local area much but I am so furious with them that they will get a mention next time.

I also want to share the shocking letter from the GMC.  

A letter from the Head of Pathway Complex Care (TL) was received by me today dated 6th July 2012.

“I need to bring to your attention the unfortunate events of Friday 29th July and the subsequent events of the weekend of 30th June and 1st July.

The Multi Disciplinary Team on Monday 2nd July had a detailed clinical discussion regarding the impact of these incidents and the distress caused to you and your daughter ………………….(by the way the name was misspelt!).

Following the discussion of the impact of these incidents on ……………………….tratment and care, as well as your ongoing relationship and support in ………………Recovery the team feel it necessary whilst an inpatient on FM2 ward at the Bethlem Royal Hospital that you refrain from visiting for a period of 2 weeks (until 15 July).

This period of respite would be beneficial to enable ……………………….. to  have a chance to discuss the issues with her advocate  (BY THE WAY RETHINK ARE HARDLY INDEPENDENT!!!!! they are closely linked to this hospital with psychiatrists on Board).  They are totally manipulated by the Consultant Psychiatrist of this ward to the point he refers any questions I may ask to them for approval and then when they were supposed to attend for meeting on riday  29th they did not turn up and so consequently no questions were answered.  TOTAL AND UTTER MANIPULATION AND CONTROL BY THIS TEAM.  

You will continue to have phone contact with …………….and continue to have weekly phone conversations with A…………….as per previous agreement.  The ward team will support …………….to meet where she and her advocate can decide on a way forward that enables …………….to ensure her Recovery is sucessful.

I hope you are supportive these temporaty interim arrangements, please contact B B Clinical Service ead Inpatient Complex Care  on ………………….if you require any further information.”

Yours

T L

Head of Pathway Complex Care

“GET ME OUT OF HERE – DO WHATEVER YOU CAN”

“I AM UNHAPPY AND NEED TO BE MOVED FROM THE FIRST FLOOR AS I FEEL DIZZY ALL THE TIME”

 I have since found the most wonderful advocate for my daughter who is totally manipulated and controlled by the team who try to make out she is fairly represented but it is dreadful what is going on in that hospital that is for sure. 

I did not go and see Elizabeth because the team have banned me as I explained previously in the most cruel way.  Also they treat you like rubbish and in the most patronising and threatening manner when you dare to challenge their so called “care”.

I have quite rightly done just this and I believe that EVERYONE should speak up about the care but the trouble is most people do not have the strength to do so but somehow I do because I like justice especially for those who are vulnerable.

Witnessed by who will hopefully become my daughter’s new advocate in place of Rethink who have psychiatrists on their Board (who have been domineered by the consultant psychiatrist who is using them in every instance nearly to get out of answering questions).  I have decided that these advocates are not independent  and do not want them for her.  I want fair representation for my daughter who is outnumbered completely and I am lucky to have found just the ideal person in the form of someone who has great experience in dealing in the most appropriate manner with a team who do not listen and do not put anything into place and then the next meeting takes place, the one after takes place and no change or anything is done.  This is “care” under the Bethlem Royal Hospital.  Anyway I am so thankful to the “new advocate/representative for being such a great support to me at the meeting on Saturday and speaking up for my daughter in the most brilliant manner which even I would not have done so greatly.  Thank you so much. 

So I have been quite tearful today because I have  had to clear out Elizabeth’s possessions from the team and try and make room in my house for these.  This has been very hard and very sad.  It is not that it was a dreadful place but unfortunately Elizabeth was not happy here –  there was one thing lacking – in the evenings she was isolated and had no company.  They refused to allow me any involvement through direct payments otherwise none of this would have happened.  She was in hospital for so long she had become very dependent on other people to do things for her but drugged up to your neck on 750mg on powerful mind-altering  LSD like drugs would have an affect on anyone.  It made her feel constantly tired. to the point she could not function.  She was not eating properly, living off junk food etc.  Every weekend I would spare time to see her and make sure she had shopping in and things were clean and washing was not overflowing which is something I have come across.   There would be rotting food in the fridge, bins overflowing, washing overflowing.  Elizabeth could not seem to function on the high dosage of drugs and needed to be reduced.  That is why I appointed the Orthomolecular Psychiatrist and she seemed to improve  until I got banned yet again!.  Still the scheme such as this is a good idea for people who can manage a bit.

I am completely banned from seeing Elizabeth now and have to wait to see what this decide after 2 weeks but Elizabeth is extremely distressed.   She rang me today and wants out of that dreadful place.  This is cruel vile vindictive “care” and abusive.  I was so shocked at what the Clinical Service Lead Inpatient Complex Care said to me when I mentioned Elizabeth had asked for a couple of things and how would I get them to her “she has everything she needs on the ward”.  Who is this heartless woman to say something like this so my solicitors and my daughter’s solicitors will be writing to her directly from now on as I am so apalled at these comments.

So I think that the only way forward is through litigation sadly unless I get to hear that for one the ban is lifted so that Elizabeth can go to the Pets Day she has requested at the local  pets shop.  If not then I will contact my solicitors they will have to liaise with my daughter’s solicitors as I want them to work very very closely as I want justice  100% for my daughter.

The text message I got from Elizabeth was that she felt a bit better today because yesterday she could barely walk and felt so ill but she had not been out anywhere and staff were constantly listening and watching all the time.   So much for human rights – there does not seem to be any in this place.

The text message from Elizabeth read that she was feeling better and that she loved me.  I have offered to show the staff these messages but they just carry on with their abusive behaviour depriving my daughter the right to see me because of 1 incident.  If anything both incidents which they try to blame me for would point to them themselves for being aggressive, threatening and they wanted to have me arrested so many times the police sounded apalled.  They have got more importnat things to deal with than a team like this.  They could soon check my character themselves and come to the conclusion that this is nonsense and then the team could be accused of wasting police time.  If they had been reasonable there would be no incidents and in any case when they call me threatening and this kind of description I am completely outnumbered by them and so resentful of their threats to have me arrested especially bearing in mind I wanted to go into the police.  All of this has made me decide to look again at such a prospect.  After all I got half way through the training course and I have discovered the police may need volunteers at local level.  I have volunteered and am now looking forward to hearing from them.  I will then be able to take a special interest in the mental health care of the area especially and have first hand knowledge of what is going on here.  There will not no need for further escorts and no need to suggest that I have to go running in an area where staff could see me.  THIS IS SO LAUGHABLE – when I put out my appeal for all the celebrities to get involved and visit the likes of my daughter this could be a standing joke as I would like a host of comedians to come and cheer the patients up.

The fete was very nice but my daughter was too ill to go to it and of course how would then have reacted if I had bumped into her in the grounds.   The wonderful new advocate and I enjoyed looking round the fete and he knew everyone in sight.  Everyone was speaking to him both patients and senior members of staff.  I could not be more lucky in finding someone as ideal as this as who could be better than someone who has experienced himself how dreadful it is to be under this shocking awful care for mental health in this country.  I shudder to think of this horror and would be frightened to go and see any doctor that could come up with some diagnosis as there are hundreds and hundreds  

 I could come up with a diagnosis of my own to this Consultant Psychiatrist in one word  “Paranoid”!  This is an ideal description of a man who demands that I do running with my daughter in sight and not disappear behind any trees or bushes.  Suddenly I am laughing my head off because this is what a member of staff told me and they must have their orders from “God” above  in this respect.     

I have a tape recording with a psychiatrist form the Maudsley starring that it takes him just 2 minutes to colme up with a diagnosis.  This is ludicrous.  Diagnoses should not be given just by looking at someone or assuming.  YOU SHOULD NEVER ASSUME.  This needs to be backed by scientific evidence.

I will be abroad for a while so its not worth writing to me.  I hope that he will be tracked down by the press whilst he is enjoying his holidays.  I hope he will be forced to acknowledge my emails and explain himself to the world.  This man has let my daughter down and promised a drug free period of assessment as follows and I WANT THIS DRUG FREE PERIOD OF ASSESSMENT PROVIDED.  It is not good enough for me as a mother that he should let my daughter down and I will never forget this and I do not want him to forget either.

Here is his promise for the world to see:

“FOLLOWING THE REQUEST OF A SECOND OPINION FROM ……………….CURRENT CARE TEAM WE HAVE OFFERED TO THE REFERRING TEAM TO ACCEPT ……………AS AN INPATIENT AT THE NATIONAL PSYCHOSIS UNIT AT THE BETHLEM HOSPITAL WHERE WE WOULD BE ABLE TO ASSESS HER MENTAL STATE DURING A DRUG FREE PERIOD.”

Well he has also said he had one or two contacts –  WHERE ARE THESE ONE OR TWO CONTACTS BECAUSE I WOULD BE PREPARED TO SEND MY DAUGHTER ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE THE CARE IS GOOD UNLIKE IN THE UK WHERE IT MUST BE ABOUT THE WORST IN THE WORLD.  THE REASON I SAY THIS IS THAT THERE IS NO EXCUSE IN A SO CALLED CIVILISED COUNTRY TO TREAT THE MOST VULNERABLE OF PEOPLE LIKE MY FATHER WHO I WILL SOON TELL THE WORLD ABOUT AND MY DAUGHTER WHO WAS DOING OK FOR HERSELF UNTIL PRESCRIBED CIPRALIX AND THEN ONE DRUG AFTER ANOTHER – CALL THAT TREATMENT –  WELL I will never ever forget the unfulfilled promise of Professor Murray  

I was full of hope when I received that letter and when I showed it to Elizabeth she was overjoyed.  Now I am furious with this so called leading professor that he has let my daughter down and he will not be able to hide abroad forever.How very cruel of him to dismiss my daughter’s cries for help and leave her to so that this team can test their drugs on her to their hearts content against her wishes with blatent disregard to her long term health and I have documented things so well as I want Elizabeth to get justice.

I cannot wait to read the files and all about myself which I have requested under the Data Protection Act and this has been agreed.  I can just This sort of thing can easily happen when they do not want the likes of me to read the files and I am entitled to do just that.  Either way if that is the case I will tell everyone and demand an inquiry in this as well.  The CQC are already supposedly looking into matter  –  Good as I have heard more than 1 patient complain that their human rights were being ignored.  The GMC have also been informed of my complaints and so have NICE because they issue guidelines and they need to at least inform people that they are not following guidelines.  It cannot possibly be written in their guidelines the following – can it?

Dr James MacCabe talks about “re-challenging patients who have previously experienced suspected blood dyscrasias or cadiovascular complications of clozapine at the National Psychosis Unit  – iS THIS PART OF THE GUIDELINES OF NICE –  I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT THIS SORT OF THING IS ALLOWED TO GO ON UNDER THE LAW AND THEY GET AWAY WITH IT.   THIS IS CARE UNDER THE BETHLEM ROYAL HOSPITAL

It is shameful that this Country who are spending a fortune on the Olympics and going to such trouble for instance on the Underground with signage etc cannot do things better for mental health care.  The most vulnerable of people are being abused under a rotten to the core system whilst the Government do NOTHING.   I cannot even be bothered to waste my breath on this Government who have let down the most vulnerable of people and DO NOTHING.  They should get their priorities right and what is more I would be happy to go on TV and speak my mind and what I think about this situation.

The most decent people of all – The Royal Family hopefully will take notice of what is going on under a hospital entitled Bethlem “Royal” Hospital when they receive my letters.  This hospital does not deserve the title of “Royal” –  I can think of a better title for them and so can all the patients no doubt.

I have written to members of the Royal Family to inform them of the abuse going on in a hospital supposedly called Bethlem “Royal” Hospital whilst Professor Murray runs away and hides abroad from my emails.   I would like the press to go and deliver a sack load of my emails to him if he is on holiday.

This is not good enough for me as a mother that he should turn his back and let my daughter down. and I want the world to know because what I am saying is the truth – there is no way on earth I would have allowed my daughter to go to such a place as this if I thought she was going to be treated in this manner and dismissed like rubbish by this Professor who has been honoured by the Royal Family.  I thought she was going to get the very best care and that has NOT been the case.

The annual fete was on today at Bethlem Royal Hospital.    I am completely banned now from seeing Elizabeth – the team have all ganged up against me – I hope God is taking care of my poor daughter as she is surrounded by evil right now.  It is pure evil what is going on under this awful ward Fitzmary II.  The patients are controlled and kept prisoner – virtual prisoner and drugged up to their necks against their wishes on poisonous highly dangerous chemicals and they are given extremely high dosages so I have heard and I know from former patients this is above BNF limits –  experimentation and clinical trials regardless of the risks involved.  As I am sitting here now I am crying my eyes out and thinking this really is HELL ON EARTH –  I absolutely hate this ward and as for the staff, they are the ones who have been threatening against me.  Thank God I have some good friends but there are none for my daughter and I am going to put out an appeal for friends to keep a look out for her as she is in a truly horrible place right now.  There is noone to help my daughter because the advocates are not independent as I see it.  Constantly the Consultant Psychiatrist was using them as an excuse not to come out with answers to questions.   Today’s meeting was about the usual topics that have not been resolved – medication as I want  her off the Clozapine, access rights to my daughter as they referred to  two incidents where staff gang up against you and say things about you but do not tell the full story.    ONe of the incidents was heartbreaking where they would not even allow my daughter to stroke her pet kitten.  They are truly evil.   I am very very unhappy about what they have done for her against her wishes with these drugs and I have read the apalling research papers ie:   

Dr James MacCabe talks about “re-challenging patients who hae previously experienced suspected blood dyscrasias or crdiovascular complications of clozapine at the National Psychosis Unit.      So this is what goes on under this hospital regardless of patient welfare –  it seems to be all about money making.

I WANT EVERYONE TO KNOW THAT MY DAUGHTER IS SUFFERING FROM SOME TERRIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF CLOZAPINE MIXED WITH ANOTHER DRUG METFORMIN AND THAT THE TEAM will be HELD RESPONSIBLE IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HER.  I JUST WANT HER OUT OF THAT PLACE.

She was too ill to even come down the stairs and walk around the grounds .  The team are so very very cruel –  they have described me as aggressive and threatening, causing upset to patients and team alike –  I am just one person against so many of these staff who have the powers to use against you and can act like God to prevent you from seeing your own son or daughter whenever they see fit.       The purpose of today’s visit was to discuss grievances but I do not feel comfortable with any of this team apart from the social worker who I believe is still off sick.   A friend came to support me and is very much involved with advocacy and patient’s rights at the hospital.  Being a former patient himself he was marvellous in the kind way he mediated and acted like an advocate between myself and the team.   This would be a much better person to be involved with my daughter’s advocacy as I would feel a little happier knowing that she is being fairly represented whereas I do not feel that at all right now.   He was not allowed into the carer’s meeting with me so I did not bother to go.    Elizabeth has spoken to this man who put himself out to try and help and support her and I was so grateful. Because I am no longer allowed to see my own daughter she wanted a few things.  I could not believe the cruelty of one person in particular who said “she has got everything she needs on the ward”.  It is this person who I want my solicitors to deal directly with and this may be the only option if things are not in place better next week.  Not only that two firms of solicitors will be acting and there is no way that Rethink are going to be used yet again to stop my daughter from having a completely independent firm of solicitors rather than one recommended by the hospital.  If they try to stop the completely independent firm then I will get my solicitors involved.  That is how bad things are.   Today I telephoned the police as I am seriously thinking of working in the local area as this was what I wanted to do – to work with people like my daughter and the Police do some good work in the community that often goes unnoticed.  Apparently they are in need of volunteers and I now have time to spare as I am not allowed to see my own daughter and do feel this would be beneficial.  My daughter must be suffering and he is probably laughing because he thinks he has more powers than God himself.  Today I went to the local churches and asked them to pray for my daughter – I would like to see visitors on that ward in the absence of myself but no-one hardly goes because families often live too far way as this serves people from all over the country and also there are those who have been abandoned by their familiies and have noone.