I am thrilled to be in touch with some other wonderful sites that also highlight the abuse which shockingly is a nationwide problem.

I turned up around 2 pm on the ward.  It was a beautiful day today but the patients were stuck indoors.  The staff were busy typing on their computers and I asked to take Elizabeth off the ward but was told I should return sharply.   They were apparently short staffed.  Well I took her out for a meal with this member of staff tagging along and a longstanding family friend.  Elizabeth was very quiet throughout this time but at least she got to go out as yesterday she had no fresh air whatsoever and the ward is stuffy and there is nothing to do but watch TV or aimlessly walk up and down.  Of course the Wii games could not be used as an electrician was needed. 

Anyway in between time I did a lot of writing as I believe this is punishment dished out to me personally as I have quite rightly so been outspoken.  There is no way my daughter should be punished by this Consultant Psychiatrist or be drugged up to her neck on a tablet she does not even know.   I AM INVOLVING RETHINK IN THIS AS HE SAID RETHINK ARE THE ONES WHO TELL HIM IT IS AGAINST MY DAUGHTER’S WISHES TO SHARE INFORMATION IN THE FILES.    ANYWAY I WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON AT THE ROYAL BETHLEM HOSPITAL.  It is not the fault of the nurses however there is something wrong with this Consultant Psychiatrist himself in my opinion – what is in his head to do this when there is no excuse for this behaviour.  It is childish and spiteful and it is against human rights.  I NOW WANT EVERY INSPECTOR DOWN TO THAT WARD AS THIS KIND OF BEHAVIOUR SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO CONTINUE.

All I have done is give brilliant information on how harmful the drugs are for a start as naturally I want the  minimal of medication and she was promised a drug free period and I want some answers here as to why this has not been done.

Whether he likes it or not I am still the nearest relative and as the nearest relative I have a right to know if something has happened to my daughter and an explanation.   I intend to keep visiting every single week so that I can keep an eye on matters.  I insist that Elizabeth comes off the ward to get some fresh air and she is MORE THAN ENTITLED.   THIS IS ABSOLUTE ABUSE IN MY OPINION.

Not allowed to take Elizabeth off the ward between 1 – 2 and this must be escorted as ordered by the Consultant Psychiatrist.

I hereby invite this Consultant Psychiatrist to give his reasons WHY to the world.   I have nothing to hide.  I have had every security test done.  I am of no risk to my daughter.  She is of NO risk to the public –  it is causing problems on the ward when a member of staff has to be there to accompany and I go at the weekends.   It is staff changeover between 1 – 2 so noone is available to accompany me.   I am being treated like a criminal yet was training to be a police officer.  I am now thinking of volunteering for the local police as I feel so sorry for the patients being couped up on such wards and treated like nothing.  The nursing staff are not to blame –  this is the fault of the person in charge – the Consultant Psychiatrist and I would welcome him speaking to all the newspapers and media on why he thinks I should be escorted everywhere with my own daughter and why he is depriving her of fresh air.  IT IS EXTREMELY SPITEFUL to do such a thing.   The staff have to obey his orders no doubt and I have heard there is staff absences causing things to be put on hold such as the weekend outings.    Maybe if I am allowed to volunteer at local level with the police then something can be done for these poor patients couped up on such a ward like a prison camp with nothing to do at weekends and can only go out when staff are available.   WHAT KIND OF CARE IS THIS.

I have had to reschedule the day to turn up later in the afternoon to coincide with when staff are available to escort me as I cannot be trusted apparently.

This professional is no doubt enjoying the company of his family yet he is trying to tear apart mine and I have nothing to hide – in fact I would welcome his comments to the world.  I would welcome the world to judge me in turn.

I would say that the reason this is happening is because I have been outspoken in terms of what I see as abuse going on – care should not be all about drugs and a patient should be listened to and not forced to take drugs against their wishes.   Orthomolecular care should be given if needed as an alternative and this does not mean just COMING OFF MEDICATION.  This means being on the minimal rather than the maximum of drugs and this doctor has put my daughter on a drug and refuses to let her speak at the recent meeting even when I offered to go out of the room.  She is none the wiser as to what tablet he has given her.   SHE COULD DIE AS A RESULT OF THE HIGH AMOUNT OF DRUGS GIVEN AND I WANT EVERYONE TO BE ACCOUNTABLE.

I agree with everything you have said in your recent comment.

Funnily enough my daughter perceptively commented that she thought the consultant psychiatrist was “on something”.    He must be very paranoid in order to only allow 1 hour escorted leave.   Thanks to me attending the meeting with a longstanding family friend this escorted leave has been extended to 2 hours but on the Friday probably because of how busy they were a member of staff was only able to come out for 1.5 hrs.  

Today I typed the minutes of the meeting to ensure that the team got a very accurate copy seeing as I never get a copy of their minutes and the excuse by the consultant psychiatrist is that he wants to concentrate on the care.  Well where is he most of the time?  He is not watching my daughter on a day to day basis.  When I have asked to speak to him he is never around.    This Consultant Psychiatrist wants to “start afresh”.  I have commented in my minutes that this is WRONG – TOTALLY WRONG.   In order to come up with any diagnosis I believe that you need to look thoroughly at what has happened in the past.  All he keeps going on about is how did she do at school.  I have commented in the minutes that this is ridiculous!!   The change in behaviour backed by the close family friend who has known Elizabeth a long time points to when she took herself off 30mg of Cipralix.   She had been on this terrible drug for a while and it brought her face up in loads of sores and led to itchiness.   It was around this time and whilst taking this drug that the whole family noticed a huge change in her.    Thanks to reading the book Prozac Pandora Panacea I now recognise what the initial cause of this behaviour was down to.   I now know how very dangerous these drugs are and I wish so much that I had done all this research from the beginning.  The change in behaviour unfortunately led her being referred to mental health services and I put my trust in these professionals but little did I know at the time that all they did was just push drug after drug after drug.  This is the treatment in their eyes and it is a highly profitable treatment for the pharmaceutical industry. 

I went to visit Elizabeth today and she looked very forlorn.   I believe this Consultant Psychiatrist is using my daughter to get back at me and I h ave mentioned this in the minutes.   He has put full emphasis on REthink by saying he goes by what they recommend or words to that effect.  Now it is down to Rethink as the Consultant Psychiatrist would not give any information even when I offered to leave the room as to what tablet he has given m y daughter.  I believe this is in breach of human rights – she has a right to know and I think he does not want me or the rest of the family to know and is worried about what she might say.   This is why I have to be escorted everywhere like a small child with my own daughter.   WHAT KIND OF CARE IS THIS – WHAT KIND OF TREATMENT IS THIS?   THIS IS NOT KIND OR NICE TREATMENT TO KEEP SOMEONE STUCK ON THE WARD WHEN IT IS NICE OUTSIDE AND DEPRIVE HER FROM GETTING FRESH AIR.  ELIZABETH HAS NOT BEEN OUT AT ALL TODAY.  WHILST HE IS ENJOYING TIME WITH HIS FAMILY ELIZABETH IS STUCK ON THE WARD WITH NOTHING MUCH TO DO.

Today I took the Wii and games to the ward for the patients but apparently an electrician has to test everything and i was told not to leave anything there on the ward as staff would be told off.   THIS IS WORSE THAN BEING AT SCHOOL IN MY OPINION.  I AM SHOCKED THAT THIS CAN GO ON IN A CIVILISED COUNTRY IN THIS DAY AND AGE.

Anyway I handed in the Minutes and there were so many people there at the meeting I could not remember everyone – how daunting this must be to my daughter especially when no advocate is there half the time as recommended in NICE guidelines.   It is no wonder she does not like Fridays.  

Anyway seeing as the Consultant Psychiatrist stubbornly refused to give ANY information on what drug she is on and also how long he is going to impose sanctions like 1 or 2 hours only escorted leave.  I have told him in the Minutes I am reconsidering a voluntary role with the Police again in the Kent area as I feel sorry for the staff in this situation as they are already short staffed as it is and the whole thing is both childish and immature on his part and abuse to my daughter.  WHAT RIGHT DOES HE HAVE TO PREVENT ME FROM TAKING HER TO SHOPPING OR CINEMA OR ANYWHERE ELSE THAT TAKES LONGER THAN JUST 2 HOURS WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO DO ON THE WARD FOR A START.  IT IS NOT AS IF MY VISIT IS CLASHING WITH ANYTHING GOING ON THERE ON THE WARD.  HE IS LAYING DOWN THE LAW IN SUCH A WAY THAT HE IS ABUSING ELIZABETH’S HUMAN RIGHTS AND WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER PATIENTS – WHAT ABOUT THEIR RIGHTS AS WELL.

IT IS NOT AS THOUGH ELIZABETH IS OF ANY DANGER WHATSOEVER TO ANYONE AND NOW I TAKE THE VIEW THAT IF THE WHOLE TEAM LOYALLY AGREE WITH THIS DECISION THEY ARE ALL AS BAD AS ONE ANOTHER.  IT TAKES SOMEONE DECENT TO STAND UP TO THIS KIND OF ABUSE AND NOT JUST GO ALONG LIKE A BUNCH OF SHEEP AND BOW DOWN TO DEMANDS LIKE THIS. 

ANYWAY I HAVE SAID I WANT TO TAKE ELIZABETH OUT TOMORROW AND OF COURSE IT HAS TO BE ARRANGED THAT A MEMBER OF STAFF COMES WITH SO THAT THIS MEMBER OF STAFF CAN REPORT BACK TO THIS CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST EVERYTHING.  HOW RIDICULOUS THIS WHOLE SITUATION IS JUST BECAUSE HE DOES NOT LIKE ME.  HE DOES NOT LIKE THE WAY I HAVE CHALLENGED HIS IDEAS.  FOR INSTANCE I TOLD  HIM HE WAS DOING WRONG BY TAKING HER OFF AS MUCH AS 150 MG AND I TOLD HIM IT SHOULD BE DONE ON A DAY TO DAY BASIS WITH MINISCULE AMOUNTS TAKEN OFF.  HE HAS NOT LISTENED TO THIS ADVICE AND I PROVIDED A CD AND BOOK WHICH I DOUBT HE COULD BE BOTHERED TO READ.

I HAVE LEFT HIM THE NEW BOOK BY PROFESSOR HEALY CALLED PHARMAGEDDON. 

NOW HE WILL NOT BUDGE ON THE 2 HOURS ESCORTED LEAVE I DOUBT UNTIL THE NEXT MEETING BUT I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO GO FOR A COUPLE OF WEEKS AND I AM USING ALL MY HOLIDAY ON GOING TO THESE MEETINGS THAT ACHIEVE NOTHING.

SO IT IS ALL DOWN TO RETHINK AND HE WOULD NOT EVEN LET ELIZABETH SPEAK AT THE MEETING AS WHEN I ASKED HER WHAT SHE WANTED HE BUTTED IN!

IT IS RUDE AND DISGRACEFUL TO DO THIS.

The main issues I have are:

Medication

Time allowed off the ward at weekends

The threatening phone calls which I today reported to Police and showed them my phone – the fact her scheme is left open as though they plan to dump her back there in the circumstances and I have asked for assurances on this as the public have a right to know what is going on in the local area as far as I am concerned.

I have not had any answers to these points and now IT IS ALL DOWN TO RETHINK SO THIS CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST SAYS AS HE GOES BY THEIR ADVICE AND HE IS DESPERATE THAT I DO NOT SEE THE FILES.   NO DOUBT MY NAME IS LIKE MUD IN THEM BUT I DO NOT CARE PERSONALLY WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT ME.  I JUST WANT THE ANSWERS TO MY QUESTIONS ABOVE AND AM ENTITLED TO BE INCLUDED ACCORDING TO NICE GUIDELINES.         

I attended the weekly ward meeting today with a close family friend but gained no further information from the Consultant Psychiatrist and team.  It was a waste of time.

Elizabeth said she was told she could only come off the ward escorted for just 1 hour a day.

When I went in with the close family friend I was told 2 hours.  Anyway that is an improvement I suppose but I am not allowed to take her out alone – I have had every security check done on me and I believe this is an infringement of my daughter’s human rights.   Whilst she is on Section 3 which was forced upon me otherwise I would have lost recognition as being nearest relative,   my daughter is of no danger to the public whatsoever and is couped up on the ward for most of the time.  She has ballooned in weight since being put on Olanzapine and has been given a new tablet and does not even know what it is – this is terrible that a patient is not even informed and is so drugged up to their necks they are completely disregarded.    It was Elizabeth’s wish to be reduced off medication but that is not to say completely taken off.  She signed a declaration before coming to this ward and had a letter in writing from Professor Murray promising a drug free period.  He now is no longer anything to do with the unit where my daughter is and all the promises have come to nothing.  So, my daughter is looking pale and bloated and has put on tremendous weight.  She is on about her 14th mind altering LSD like drug and is being manipulated as I see it.   Rethink are the advocates and were nowhere to be seen at this meeting.  It is recommended by NICE guidelines that advocates are present but the Consultant Psychiatrist was keen to say that they have been involved and have visited Elizabeth on her own and they have informed him that she does not want the family to see her files and in other words know what is going on.  Elizabeth was in the meeting and when I put the question to her the consultant psychiatrist butted in and did not allow her to speak. I then offered to go out as if she did not want me personally to see the files then the rest of the family should be allowed to have information –  she after all signed several letters before she was drugged up like this and in a better way to allow the family to see what was going on but this is being denied and I believe that she has been so weakened by the powers of this consultant psychiatrist that she simply does not have any rights any more.   HER RIGHTS ARE BEING ABUSED AND I HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF WHETHER RETHINK VISIT THAT OFTEN AND BESIDES MY DAUGHTER LOVED COMING OFF THE WARD AND GOING TO THE LOCAL SHOPPING CENTRES, BEING OUT IN THE FRESH AIR – GETTING OFF THE WARD WHERE SHE FINDS IT STRESSFUL.   SHE DID SAY SHE FELT VERY TIRED AND IF SHE HAS BEEN PUT ON AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF DRUGS – THE MOST HAS BEEN 800MG THEN IT IS NO WONDER WHY SHE IS TIRED AND LETHARGIC BUT NOONE KNOWS WHAT DRUG SHE IS ON – SHE THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE METHADONE.

Anyway I typed a list of questions and got no answers about the medication whatsoever and Elizabeth sat there quietly throughout the meeting and was NOT allowed to speak when I tried to include her.  An advocate must be present and the friend of mine suggested that another meeting was called with the advocate present to satisfy the Consultant Psychiatrist that it was what Elizabeth wanted.   He was adamant that Elizabeth had said she did not want the family to see the files AND THIS IS NOT TRUE AS SHE SIGNED MORE THAN ONE LETTER OF CONSENT IN THIS RESPECT BEFORE SHE WAS SO DRUGGED UP TO HER NECK ON GOD KNOWS WHAT!

I have had 3 so far late at night but I am not afraid.  I would much rather have these phone calls than Elizabeth – besides I am keeping Police informed but what is so bad is that the Royal Bethlem Hospital do not seem to care less and noone has rung me back.  I am worried that Elizabeth is getting the calls too from a patient she met on a mixed ward.   MIXED WARDS SHOULD BE BANNED.

I spoke very briefly to Elizabeth today and will visit at the weekend.  I have put in a day’s holiday to attend the ward meeting and instead of speaking will list points and questions – one question is has he put her on Methadone.  She does not even know what she is taking.  THIS IS ABUSE!  The law is geared not to protect the vulnerable but the doctors.

Today I had an interesting invitation to meet with all the Heads of the various pharmaceutical companies.   would have loved to have turned up and given them a piece of my mind  – Instead I have asked when the next meeting are due in London and I will make a point of going.   I just wish I had more time to deal with all of this but I work full time.

It is not right that this violent person who is currently theatening me should be out and about unescorted  and I have a letter from the Assistant Director of Social Services to this effect that it is down to human rights. 

Anyway, I told the police about the phone calls but would rather get them than Elizabeth any day.  

Today whilst at work I received text messages from Elizabeth asking me to bring things to her when I next visit.   I briefly texted her back to say that I would hopefully be coming to the meeting on Friday at the hospital and would bring her whatever she wanted.  Hopefully at this meeting I will get some answers to my question but I dont count on it.   It worries me the way Elizabeth was talking in her later telephone call to me.     I went outside to take this call and she described how she was feeling.  “Mum, I feel so ill, I am lying down on the bed and feel like I am at Death’s Door”.    Elizabeth has talked strangely before but also mentioned about a tablet they gave her to take.   I asked if she had found o ut what it is and she said “no”.  I am most concerned.  If only I could take her away to Earth House in America.   This place is set in beautiful grounds and they respect the patient –  it is not to say they encourage someone to come completely off medication but surely to keep someone on the minimal amount is much kinder and to listen to that person instead of ignoring them.  There is nowhere like that over here in this Country and I think that this is what is needed.   Looking at the acute wards I could not get over how many patients were returning back time and time again to the wards not appearing to get any better.   It is upsetting to get calls like this and to know that Elizabeth is missing out on life and has had such an awful time over the past years.

 I wish I had read the book by Dr Ann Blake Tracy before and knew just how harmful these drugs are.  I had n o idea but began to be suspicious when I could see she was getting worse and not better and suddenly she was aggressive and and everything about her had changed.  I can now associate with everything I have seen in Elizabeth’s behaviour in that wonderful book Prozac Panacea Pandora.  Thank God some honest professionals are willing to tell the truth.   IT ALL STARTED WHEN SHE TOOK ANTI-DEPRESSANTS CALLED CIPRALIX.  NOW I KNOW THAT ALL THESE DRUGS ARE THE SAME BUT WITH A DIFFERENT NAME BUT SHOULD BE CALLED PROZAC PROZAC AND PROZAC.  Dr Healy links these drugs with suicide but you think that they are different because they are different in name and are very cleverly marketed.

Also I have had more than one call from an acquaintance of my daughter who she originally met on a mixed ward who I warned to stay away from her.   This person is violent and has been in prison and tonight again I got a call and the day before a nasty text message.  I hope the Royal Bethlem are not letting him visit my daughter after he was allowed to on one occasion.  This is the patient who was on a Section 3 so the Police told me when he was turning up on my doorstep.  Unfortunately Elizabeth gave this person my address and this person mistook someone elses house as mine and threatened them badly.  Apparently locally a Section 3 patient can go out unescorted as part of their human rights.    It is the opposite at Royal Bethlem –  it is like a prison camp t here – everything is locked and you have to get someone to open the door to let you out.  I believe they go too far in that respect and I believe they are breaching my daughter’s human rights by what they are doing at the  moment.

Meanwhile looking at the court papers, the local council is full of praise for themselves they say the following:

They are “committed to serving the whole borough fairly, delivering excellent services and building strong communities.”

Of course I do not agree with any of  this at all. 

I have just seen a letter written by her sister that she is worried about her care.  Her sister states she was diagnosed age 13 with schizophrenia and goes on to say she supports her sister in her dislike of the medication and all the side effects she is experiencing.  If anyone should know she should – she was put on anti-psychotics age 13 – not tried and tested on children. Her sister goes on to say that the drugs do not work in her case and that any withdrawal should be done slowly.  I believe this is why things do not work when these doctors take someone off a large amount of medication and it only causes distress and terrible withdrawal symptoms whereas it should be done slowly and very very gradually on a day to day basis and any withdrawal should be done in a hospital environment not in the community.  This help is not given at all –  you get help in coming off cocaine/heroin for instance but I do not know of any help as regards these drugs on prescription even if you are having terrible effects from using these drugs. 

“Mum, they have given me another medication to take – I think it is Methadone but I am not sure what it is”.  “Why dont you ask – you must ask what you are taking before you agree and look at the information they should automatically provide on this drug”.

This conversation took place today on my visit to the ward to see Elizabeth.  I went up to the office and told them about this conversation and asked them to verify to Elizabeth what new medication had been given but the nurse there said she was “not aware of any changes”.  I insisted there had been a change and that I wanted to know what she was put on next but the nurse claimed to have no knowledge.  Another patient was telling my daughter how important it was to know about what medication she was taking and that she looks everything up however Elizabeth is so drugged up now that she is “like putty in their hands”.  It is wrong and unfair to treat someone like this and to take advantage of them when they are weak and vulnerable and have had all their rights taken away from them.  What kind of care is this.  Is this a civilised country. 

In order to have these drugs – they have to be tested on animals like helpless mice, rabbits – one experiment involving mice on these drugs resulted in the mice tearing one another apart.   Rabbits are normally docile and they became aggressive. 

Dr Candace Pert who has written the book “Molecules of Emotion” has been very outspoken on these drugs and she is one of the creators.

So not only are animals suffering but human beings, the most vulnerable of people are being abused and drugged up to their necks against their wishes.   Elizabeth thought she was going into Royal Bethlem Hospital for a drug free period and proper assessment and no sooner had she got there, the Consultant Psychiatrist and Pharmacist were trying to persuade her to take Clozapine and THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN AGAINST HER WISHES.  

To my horror now that a treatment order has been enforced this team can do whatever they like and can force medication upon my daughter whether she wants it or not.  Or else, they can drug her up on the highest dosage to the point she does not know what she is doing and agrees.  SHE DOES NOT EVEN KNOW WHAT DRUG SHE IS ON AT THE MOMENT AND THIS IS SO VERY APALLING.

In America there is a place called Earth House I would have loved Elizabeth to go to.  They give the minimal of medication and call the patients students.    Patients are treated with respect and not kept prisoner.   Some patients escape from this hospital and I do not know whether some do not get out at all and end up dead.   If they continue to give all these drugs to Elizabeth she will die that is for sure BUT NOONE COULD CARE LESS – ALL THEY WANT TO DO IS EXPERIMENT AND CHANGE AND ALTER THE MEDICATION THROWING HER OFF BALANCE WITH HER BEHAVIOUR AND ALL OF IT IS DONE ON A TRIAL AND ERROR BASIS.   YES THEY ARE CARRYING OUT TESTS ON HER ALL THE TIME AS REGARDS BLOOD TESTS BUT THIS DOES NOT GUARANTEE HER SAFETY AND SHE COULD END UP DEAD.  THIS IS A SERIOUS AMOUNT OF MEDICATION THEY ARE GIVING TO A YOUNG GIRL WHO HAS HAD HER LIFE RUINED WITH ALL THESE DRUGS.  SHE WAS NEVER VIOLENT, SHE WAS IMMACULATELY BEHAVED – SHE ONCE HAD A JOB, ONCE WAS LEARNING TO DRIVE, ONCE HAPPY THEN SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED AND UNFORTUNATELY SHE VISITED HER DOCTOR AND THE FIRST THING ON OFFER WAS ANTI DEPRESSANTS.   SHE TOOK HERSELF OFF THESE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS IN ONE GO AND THAT WAS WHEN THERE WAS A HUGE CHANGE AND SHE BECAME UNRECOGNISABLE AS THE PERSON SHE ONCE WAS.  

Instead of counselling drugs are given and once on them you cannot just come off.   The drugs have the same effect as LSD.   Elizabeth never heard voices in the first instance and another expert says another diagnosis in the files.

I am absolutely in despair as a mother and am so worried for Elizabeth.    The team have all ganged up against me and no longer want me to take her out unless escorted.    That means there is no privacy and someone from the team is listening all the time and no doubt makes notes to report back to the Consultant Psychiatrist and it only takes one word against me to get him to place a ban altogether and so I am going to ask for some help from the local churches seeing as the team do not trust me to be with my daughter any more and I have had every security test etc etc done on me, this might be a solution.    The whole thing is very very cruel.  Everyone has their jobs at stake and everyone must comply whether they agree or not.  I am being punished for being outspoken but I have every concern as a mother.  There is supposed to be an organisation called Rethink involved but they have not bothered to reply to my email recently.

When someone is on such a treatment order their rights are stripped from them and the law does not protect them – it protects the doctors and social workers – WHAT KIND OF JUSTICE IS THIS FOR THE MOST VULNERABLE OF PATIENTS LIKE THE MENTALLY ILL AND LIKE THE ELDERLY.   THERE NEEDS TO BE BETTER COMPLAINTS SYSTEMS IN PLACE AND THE PHSO AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT OMBUDSMAN HAVE SHUT DOWN MY CASE WITHOUT ANY SATISFACTORY SOLUTIONS IN PLACE AND BESIDES THEY  HAVE NO POWERS.  WHAT GOOD IS THIS AND THIS LEAVES THE LIKES OF MY DAUGHTER UNDER THE CONTROL OF A TEAM WHO CAN DO WHAT THEY LIKE WITHOUT QUESTION UNTIL OF COURSE A PATIENT DIES AND THAT IS WHY I AM DOCUMENTING THIS WHOLE THING.   I AM SO SO WORRIED FOR MY DAUGHTER RIGHT NOW – IF THEY  HAVE PUT HER ON METHADONE WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON.   I AM GOING TO PUT IN FOR ANOTHER DAY OFF TO ATTEND THE WEEKLY MEETING.   THIS TIME I AM GOING TO JUST TYPE OUT QUESTIONS AND NOT SPEAK AS I HAVE GOT SO UPSET AT THESE MEETINGS BEFORE AND HAVE COME AWAY WITH NO ANSWERS.

ANOTHER QUESTION WOULD BE THE PLACEMENT OF MY DAUGHTER AS THE LOCAL AREA IS NOT GOOD AND THE CARE HAS BEEN APALLING THERE.  THE TEAM AT LOCAL LEVEL ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE PROVISION OF CARE BUT SURELY THEY ARE NOT GOING TO PLACE HER BACK UNDER THAT SCHEME FOR THE 9TH TIME WHICH IS TOTALLY AGAINST HER WISHES AND SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPENED TO  HER THERE.  

THE ONLY SOLUTION SOMETIMES IS TO MOVE TO A BETTER AREA TO GET AWAY FROM THIS SITUATION.

I AM NEITHER HAPPY ANY MORE IN THIS AREA OR THIS COUNTRY WHERE THE CARE IS CRUEL AND ABUSIVE.

ELIZABETH’S DREAM CONSTANTLY IS THAT WE VISIT FINLAND.   SHE TALKS NON STOP ABOUT FINLAND ALL THE TIME AS SHE WAS SO HAPPY THERE AND SPENT SEVERAL MONTHS THERE. 

ALL I WANT IS FOR ELIZABETH TO BE HAPPY AND THAT SHE CAN GET AWAY FROM THIS AWFUL PLACE AND A TEAM WHO ARE DESTROYING EVERYTHING AND NO LONGER WANT ME TO TAKE MY OWN DAUGHTER OUT AND GIVE HER FRESH AIR, TAKE HER TO THE CINEMA, TAKE HER TO SHOPPING.  NO LONGER CAN WE SPEND TIME TOGETHER ANY MORE UNLESS SOMEONE ESCORTS US AND LISTENS TO EVERY WORD OF OUR CONVERSATION, SOMEONE IS REPORTING BACK TO THE CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST EVERY THING SAID OR DONE –

It is not only people suffering but look at the tests done on the animals to produce these terrible drugs.  I read in one book I have – Prozac Panacea Pandora by Dr Ann Blake Tracy that inone experiment mice tore one another apart and rabbits became aggressive and they are normally docile animals.   If this is the effect on animals then vulnerable people suffer too and cannot control their emotions.    The drugs act like LSD giving hallucinations and nightmares.  Elizabeth has told me that she is having a nightmare during the day and has suffered from hallucinations.  She is frightened by all of this –  IT IS SO VERY SAD.

Everyone will soon be focused on the Olympics.   Elizabeth was once a good runner.  She was helping me with my running technique when I was training to be a police officer and she helped me in my training to get through the bleep test.    Elizabeth was training with the Special Olympics team.   Elizabeth would go every Sunday and I would take her along with other disabled runners.   I also joined Elizabeth in an abled-bodied running club locally and she did well there and I used to take her, sit and watch and take her back afterwards.   Whilst living locally I used to collect her and have her over for dinner and she used to stay overnight .

It came to the point that every time it was time to go back to the scheme she would act up and become very unstable – she was unhappy under that scheme and something happened to her.    I do not know what is going ot happen now and cannot understand why this scheme is still up and running and a lot of money being spent on it when she has made it clear she does not want to return there.  I had to sleep on the floor a whole week as she was afraid and she wanted to go into hospital to get away from there and feel safe.    The reason I could not have her home was by this time she was so unstable and there had been incidents and other people living at home I had to consider.  Having research matters thoroughly I now know that the condition Elizabeth was suffering is called Akathisia and this is a direct result of the drug itself. 

Dr Ann Blake Tracy has put me in touch with others and I am not alone in my situation but many people are so weakened and especially the patients that they are unable to speak up for themselves.  This is so sad and it is these people that need protecting and teams need to be more answerable – it should never be a solution to get rid of the closest member of the family because it makes life easy when in fact a team should be working with the closest member of the family in my opinion.

Before this job and the previous one I was in part time work which allowed me to spend time with Elizabeth.

Elizabeth had swimming lessons and learned to swim at my local gym.  I then gave h er the opportunity of doing competitive swimming like I did once.    Elizabeth did not wish to stick at this any longer as this involved training several  times a week.  Unfortunately this stopped but I continued to take her regularly over to my gym where they had indoor/outdoor pools.  During school holidays there was a bowling facility and we used to go to this. 

As a child contrary to what is written in the files I believe Elizabeth was happy – no signs of abnormality with her behaviour.

Whilst being divorced and in part time work I could not provide holidays but Elizabeth did not miss out as she would go with other family members on holiday and would go to some very nice places, namely Grand Canaria, Spain etc.    One year I took Elizabeth to see her Grandad’s family in Poland, her Grandmas family in Germany and then onto Disneyland Paris.

During the school holidays, I would take Elizabeth to Chessington and Thorpe Park. 

Xmas I would go to town on making Xmas nice for her.

Despite being divorced things were amicable.   There was no fighting or squabbling as to who would have Elizabeth – she got to see both of us and was taken out by both of us at weekends.   I would also take her to see the museums in London  – the occasional long weekend was very nice and I would go to Cumbria where I had a close friend.  On the way back we went to Alton Towers.

Apart from swimming which Elizabeth gave up,  someone else in the family was doing dancing and so I asked would Elizabeth like to do dancing?    Attached to my gym was a new school for dance that had been set up and I went out and bought the entire ballet outfit for Elizabeth.  That did not last either unfortunately.  Then Elizabeth asked for piano lessons and I put her in for this – again she did not last and she seemed to have trouble in learning as things were becoming more and more complicated.

Elizabeth had private lessons in IT when it came to my notice she was struggling with this at school.

Elizabeth was learning French at college and later Swedish as she had the trip of a lifetime to go to in Finland. 

Just before this trip I went out to buy lots of clothes for Elizabeth as I thought things would be freezing in Finland during the month she was going out there.  Finland was one of the highlights of my daughter’s life and she so wants to go back there.  I have heard there is unique care for mental health in a place called Torniio and now I myself want to go there to find out more.

Elizabeth worked in restaurants as part of her studies – she has a great time and made a friend there who I later invited to come over with her sister and Elizabeth got invited to say with her friend’s family.

Elizabeth liked sport and I encouraged this.  She was going to the special olympics training and every Sunday I would take her along with people from the learning disability scheme  nearby.  Elizabeth was very very good at running and joined a local running club  in addition.

All of these activities involved me taking her and bringing her back home.  I would either sit and watch or else hang around until the end of the session.

On Sundays when I had her I would take her to church and she was involved in the Brownies.

Elizabeth likes music – however not the kind of music I would go for.   She went to concerts and I took her to see shows.

Every weekend I would cook dinner and Elizabeth would help as she enjoyed cooking.  That was her ambition – to go into this line of work.

Elizabeth loves animals and I had rabbits and guinea pigs and then the guinea pigs had babies – she was overjoyed at this.

I have now bought for Elizabeth Fluffy and she has requested I bring him to the hospital – I do not think this would go down well at all.  I am already not in their good books.

Then Elizabeth made a new friend at school and started to spend more time in that friend’s company and not at home.  When this friend came round they would spend time together playing the piano/writing lyrics.

I was by this time quite involved in the care of two other family members who were very ill but I was happy as I thought that she was safe and happy and just getting on with her life.     

I am most concerned that organisations like the CQC do not properly investigate matters allowing abuse to continue.

For instance a patient may be covered with bruises all over her face and you ask for an explanation and get nothing in return.  It could be innocent but on the other hand how did the bruises come about and how do they force someone to take a drug they do not want – is that person pinned down and strapped to a bed or do a crowd of staff corner that patient pinning them down and forcing them to have an injection – is this what goes on? 

As for the CQC, the rating system where many places are rated as excellent is wrong in my opinion.    People can be wrongly influenced when they see “Excellent” under the ratings when in fact it is the complete opposite. 

I do not know how often they send their inspectors to look at complaints but things need to be a lot stricter and anyone can go into a mental health institution/ward and see it during the day and come away satisfied but what goes on behind closed doors!    I have witnessed some bad things, staff ignoring patients, a patient bring dragged by members of staff, patients complaining that their rights are not being listened to in many cases.

If a patient refuses a drug whilst on a treatment order then what!  I would like to hear what really goes on behind closed doors.

If the law backs these psychiatrists without making them accountable to give full scientific evidence then that is a breach of human rights in itself.   BEFORE a psychiatrist can proceed with the enforcement of drugs I believe they need to show full proof and this does not just involve blood tests or observations.  The fact is that there are no tests that can prove anything and so really these poor patients are used as human guinea pigs for experimentation purposes.  Noone speaks out as the nusing staff would otherwise lose their jobs.  The likes of my daughter now under their control provide work and money to the pharmaceutical industry. 

No matter how good a specialist hospital is rated, there are huge risks involved when you tamper with medication and the fact is this Consultant Psychiatrist has taken her off a large amount so he said he was going to and from what I have heard has mixed this with another drug that has the highest suicide rate according to Professor Healy’s research.  All I have done as a mother is to speak up for my daughter and have said that once off the drugs I would have her home again as I believe the drugs were the cause of her behaviour.  Yes I would have her home but I do not think that is the best solution as she will need to be independent and cannot depend on me as a mother for the rest of her life.   Having said that, if you take someone off the drugs too quickly like this then they can go downhill several months down the line.  This is the sad fact – withdrawing from these drugs needs to be done very very carefully and should be done under professional help and to stay off these drugs, you need to do it over a very long period of time and very slowly and gradually.  I am not a doctor but I believe this is the case as I have seen failure at first hand because of too steep a withdrawal twice before.

Once on a treatment order noone tells you anything but I have found that the case anyway even before, though I am nearest relative you get no information and even when you have a signed consent form giving consent for information to the family, they discount this and refuse you to have sight of the files by saying that the patient has changed her mind or – there is a mistake on the file and that is despite signing in front of the whole family.   They disallow you to see the files and have any real information and this is so very wrong. A patient drugged up to their neck is also not likely to ask for their files or be strong enough to defend themselves against the team.

The fact is though things could still come back on this team as something could happen to make them accountable and my blog is a very honest one –  I am deeply concerned for my daughter’s life right now because of the amount of medication one psychiatrist after another put her on at local level and the Maudsley are continuing with this experimentation and not giving any information but what when someone dies –  then there has to be an investigation and as in the case of another family member  which I cannot speak about right now,  I would want a full and huge investigation God forbid this happens to my daughter.  A psychiatrist at local level admitted the drugs are given on a trial and error basis.

The last things said to me were “GET ME OUT OF HERE” –  she is not happy there –  none of the patients look happy in fact – the fact that there is such tight security says it all –  they keep patients in like prisoners so they cannot go missing and surely anyone would want to escape from this.  However, Elizabeth was willing to remain until such time a more suitable placement could be found. 

The other thing said to a nurse during my last visit was “LEAVE US ALONE – I WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH MY MUM BY MYSELF”.   I did not encourage Elizabeth to say this at all.  At the same time a patient can turn against you as being the closest person as they blame you for “PUTTING THEM IN THE SITUATIN WHERE THEY ARE IN – LIKE ELIZABETH BLAMES ME FOR PUTTING HER INTO THE ROYAL BETHLEM AS SHE IS UNHAPPY THERE.  IN FACT THIS WAS THE ONLY THING ON OFFER – I HAD IN FACT ASKED FOR THE WONDERFUL CAMBION FOUR STAR WARDS – THIS IS REALLY WHAT I WANTED.

YES MY VIEWS ARE STRONG ON THE DRUGS AND THIS IS WHY THE TEAM DO NOT LIKE ME AS THIS IS THE MAIN TREATMENT UNDER THE NHS BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT I WOULD ATTEMPT TO GET MY DAUGHTER OFF THE DRUGS M YSELF AS I AM NOT A DOCTOR AT THE END OF THE DAY.   ALSO I AM NOT ADVISING MY DAUGHTER TO TAKE HERSELF OFF THE DRUGS AT ALL.  I AM NOT TELLING MY DAUGHTER TO STOP TAKING THE DRUGS OR INFOUENCING HER THERE AS I KNOW THAT NOW SHE IS ON THAT ORDER THEY CAN JUST DO WHATEVER THEY LIKE WITH MY POOR DAUGHER AND SO THE SOONER SHE GETS OUT AND IS TRANSFERRED TO A NICE PLACE THE  BETTER FOR ME AS THE WHOLE THING IS AFFECTING MY HEALTH. 

WHY PUNISH HER IN SUCH A NASTY WAY TO GET BACK AT ME BECAUSE THAT IS HOW I SEE IT.   IT IS OF NO BENEFIT TO ELIZABETH THAT SHE IS NO LONGER ALLOWED OUT TO THE PARK, TO RESTAURANTS, CINEMA OR CHURCH EVEN IN MY COMPANY AT THE WEEKENDS AT A TIME WHEN THERE IS NOTHING WHATSOEVER GOING ON  .  ACTIVITIES ARE HELD DURING THE WEEK BUT AT WEEKENDS THERE IS NOTHING – I SEE THIS AS EXTREMELY CRUEL AND WRONG THAT MY DAUGHTER SHOULD BE PUNISHED BECAUSE OF ME AND I FEEL SO GUILTY SHE IS THERE AT THAT HOSPITAL, ROYAL BETHLEM WHERE I TRULY BELIEVED THEY WOULD RESPECT AND HELP HER.

IN THE COURT PAPERS IT SAYS THAT CLOZAPINE HAS BEEN REFUSED BY THE PATIENT BUT THAT THIS WOULD BE CONSIDERED TREATMENT IF SHE DID NOT RESPOND TO CURRENT TREATMENT OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT.

CLOZAPINE – VOLUNTARILY WITHDRAWN BY THE MANUFACTURER IN 1975 AS IT WAS SHOWN TO CAUSE AGRANULOCYTOSIS – A CONDITION INVOLVING A DANGEROUS DECREASE IN THE NUMBER OF WHITE BLOOD CELLS THAT LED TO DEATH IN SOME PATIENTS.  HOWEVER THE FDA GIVES FIVE BLACK BOX WARNINGS FOR AGRANULOCYTOSIS, SEIZURES, MYOCARDITIS FOR “OTHER ADVERSE CARDIOVASCULAR AND REESPIRATORY EFFECTS.  CLOZAPINE IS USED AS A LAST RESORT IN PATIENTS WHO HAVE NOT RESPONDED TO OTHER ANTI-PSYCHOTIC TREATMENTS DUE TO ITS DANGER OF CAUSING AGRANULOCYTOSIS AS WELL AS COSTS OF HAVING TO HAVE BLOOD TESTS CONTINUALLY DURING TREATMENT.   THIS IS WHAT ELIZABETH DID NOT WANT TO HAVE.  SHE IS STILL TALKING ABOUT THE ABUSE SHE SUFFERED IN THE FIRST INSTANCE AND HAS NOT GOT OVER THIS.  WHY CANT THE NHS SEE THE FACTS – A PATIENT NEEDS COUNSELLING NOT DRUGS.  WHY DO THEY CONTINUE TO ABUSE MY DAUGHTER IN THIS NASTY WAY, CONTROLLING TO SUCH AN EXTENT I CAN NOT EVEN SPEND TIME IN TAKING HER TO CHURCH AS THEY HAVE IMPOSED STRICT ORDERS THAT I B E ESCORTED EVERY WHERE WITH HER AND THERE IS NOONE TO ESCORT HER DURING THE WEEKEND. 

I WANT A FULL ACCOUNT OF THIS ON MY BLOG AS IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO MY DAUGHTER I WANT A FULL INVESTIGATION AND HUGE PUBLICITY LEADING TO CHANGES IN THE MENTAL HEALTH SYSTEM SO THAT NOONE ELSE GOES THROUGH WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH.

IN SHORT THEY HAVE DESTROYED MY LIFE –  THEY HAVE TAKEN EVERYTHING FROM ME.  

I AM JUST A MOTHER BUT ALL I WANT IS FOR MY DAUGHTER TO BE HAPPY.  I HAVE BEEN TREATED LIKE A COMMON CRIMINAL AND MY DAUGHTER STRIPPED OF HER HUMAN RIGHTS – IT IS TERRIBLE WHAT IS GOING ON AND THE FACT THAT NOTHING IS DONE ABOUT IT.

A PRISONER WOULD APPEAR TO HAVE MORE RIGHTS THAN A MENTAL HEALTH PATIENT AND THIS IS SO VERY WRONG.

SURELY IT IS ENOUGH FOR THIS TEAM THE FACT THAT  ELIZABETH MAY WELL NOT RETURN TO THE LOCAL AREA AND I AM MORE THAN HAPPY WITH THIS AS THE CARE IS APALLING BOTH UNDER THE NHS AND SOCIAL SERVICES.   THE PLACES SHE WOULD BE POSSIBLY SENT TO ARE A FAIR DISTANCE AWAY FROM HOME AND I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO SEE HER MUCH AND ALSO SHE WOULD BE UNDER MORE TEAMS HOWEVER THERE IS ONE PLACE I HAVE HEARD OF THAT REALLY RESPECT PATIENTS THAT HAVE SUFFERED ABUSE AND THIS IS THE PLACE I WANT HER TO GO TO AND THE SOONER THE BETTER.

ALL I AM WORRIED ABOUT NOW IS THAT THE TEAM WILL TAKE IT OUT ON  MY DAUGHTER AS NONE OF THEM LIKE ME BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN SO OUTSPOKEN.  SURELY SENDING HER TO A MUCH NICER AND PEACEFUL ENVIRONMENT WOULD BE THE BEST OPTION THAN KEEPING HER LOCKED UP AS A PRISONER, INFRINGING ON HER HUMAN RIGHTS BY NOT EVEN ALLOWING HER OUT TO CHURCH WITH ME AT THE WEEKENDS. 

WHAT A DISGRACE THE SYSTEM IS THAT ALLOWS SOMETHING LIKE THIS TO HAPPEN.  UNLESS A PATIENT IS AT RISK FROM A RELATIVE THAT IS EITHER UNDER DRUGS OR HAS SEXUALLY ABUSED THAT PERSON OR IS VIOLENT – FOR THESE REASONS YES THERE SHOULD BE RESTRICTIONS BUT I HAVE HAD EVERY CHECK DONE ON ME THROUGH A POLICE APPLICATION AND HAD TO GIVE UP TRAINING BECAUSE OF MY PERSONAL SITUATION WITH MY DAUGHTER WHEN I APPOINTED THE ORTHOMOLECULAR PSYCHIATIRST.